"A hot dog is not a sandwich." The crowd murmurs in general agreement.
"In fact.....Itis a taco." The crowd forms into an angry mob as I am forcibly carried towards the guillotine.
ladefuckingda ladefuckingda
24 sep 2020
"A hot dog is not a sandwich." The crowd murmurs in general agreement. "In fact.....Itis a taco." The crowd forms into an angry mob as I am forcibly carried towards the guillotine.
Ari LaBelja
Me making sure everyone on the couch is paying attention when I'm the one that picked the movie:
7-08 PM - Twitter for iPhone
Ari LaBelja Me making sure everyone on the couch is paying attention when I'm the one that picked the movie: 7-08 PM - Twitter for iPhone
The smile of a father
DNA test
That doesn't need a DNA test
denisep denisep
3 jun
The smile of a father DNA test That doesn't need a DNA test
aparticularlygoodfinder brokensilence1 37:
lynaroo:
iv
think this bird got confused when someone told him he belonged in the sky.
He decided to be the sky instead.
TINY SKY CHICKEN
=Chicken
frogclit frogclit
23 sep 2020
aparticularlygoodfinder brokensilence1 37: lynaroo: iv think this bird got confused when someone told him he belonged in the sky. He decided to be the sky instead. TINY SKY CHICKEN =Chicken
20 YEARS FROM NOW. KIDS ARE GOING TO REALIZE
THEIR QUARANTINE HAIRCUTS WERE DONE BALL HAIR, CLIPPERS
Ru5ty Ru5ty
24 nov 2020
20 YEARS FROM NOW. KIDS ARE GOING TO REALIZE THEIR QUARANTINE HAIRCUTS WERE DONE BALL HAIR, CLIPPERS
Jesus is here to give you strength during NNN
Be strong my child.
thelastairbenderp thelastairbenderp
5 nov 2020
Jesus is here to give you strength during NNN Be strong my child.
Game: press any button to play
Me: *presses my belly button*
Game: *starts*
*Confused screaming*
na346g na346g
26 apr
Game: press any button to play Me: *presses my belly button* Game: *starts* *Confused screaming*
humans: hate the year 2020 bc reasons
their pets who will remember this year because it's the year they got the most scritches n snuggles:
post_pro_millennial post_pro_millennial
27 sep 2020
humans: hate the year 2020 bc reasons their pets who will remember this year because it's the year they got the most scritches n snuggles:
*5 mins after getting kidnapped*
"So what made you choose me
*5 mins after getting kidnapped* "So what made you choose me
I DROPPED MY DOG OFF TO BE GROOMED
ENDED UP BRINGING HOME JOE DIRT
bitchpudden49 bitchpudden49
27 sep 2020
I DROPPED MY DOG OFF TO BE GROOMED ENDED UP BRINGING HOME JOE DIRT
Steve Harvey
Stop sending me this shit! I don't use that kind of toothbrush
@tho weld see
Ovor of deys over the age of are affected by gum disease
SAVE YOUR DOG'S LIFE NOW!!
Free Worldwide Shipping
cornedsyrup cornedsyrup
21 sep 2020
Steve Harvey Stop sending me this shit! I don't use that kind of toothbrush @tho weld see Ovor of deys over the age of are affected by gum disease SAVE YOUR DOG'S LIFE NOW!! Free Worldwide Shipping
Me: *hits my elbow on desk*
My entire nervous system:
asmordusu asmordusu
8 dec 2020
Me: *hits my elbow on desk* My entire nervous system:
Dutch: I have a plan we just need
money
Arthur:
flipper_fire flipper_fire
8 may
Dutch: I have a plan we just need money Arthur:
I refer to testicles as "wonkas" because they're in between a willy and a chocolate factory.
I refer to testicles as "wonkas" because they're in between a willy and a chocolate factory.
What a catch! Get you a girl who can provide!
batty_caffesmash batty_caffesmash
6 jan 2021
What a catch! Get you a girl who can provide!
bunjywunjy Follow
anonymous asked: @
Do you have any blessed facts laying around? Today was need a:)
bunjywunjy answered:
unlike rabbits, a baby hare can run, fight, or flee almost immediately after birth.
by faboo978 Follow
Fresh out of the womb, ready to fuck shit up.
OffensiveMemez OffensiveMemez
17 sep 2020
bunjywunjy Follow anonymous asked: @ Do you have any blessed facts laying around? Today was need a:) bunjywunjy answered: unlike rabbits, a baby hare can run, fight, or flee almost immediately after birth. by faboo978 Follow Fresh out of the womb, ready to fuck shit up.
GTA pedestrians seeing me driving towards them at 140mph
phantom_g phantom_g
30 dec 2020
GTA pedestrians seeing me driving towards them at 140mph