• Army Recruiter Hey you're graduating soon
can I taIk to you about our coHege benefits
HS kid: I'm good. Gona go to class...
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    • And then you get married
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    • Recruiters are assholes. They called our house after my brother went to college. My mom picked up the phone, and the recruiter said, "Oh, is his MOMMY taking his phone calls?" My mom was like, "Bitch, he's 100 miles away. Fuck off."
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    • I was told to turn off my phone vibration by this feature. I don't know...
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    • I told one recruiter I wasn't interested because I do theatre and he stayed silent for a second and tried to figure out how to bs saying that the military has every job imaginable.
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    • Never go into the army based on the benefits that your recruiter tells you you’ll get. They will lie their asses off because the more people they get to sign up, the better it is for them. Many of their promises will never be fulfilled. Only join the military if you truly want to, regardless of gain
      NuhUhNigg 13 apr
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    • Army recruiters always strike me as desperate salesmen with a fake smile
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    • My recruiter took me to take a practice ASVAB like a week into me even knowing them. I did well on it and the dude was like "okay this test was real, let's go get it verified and get you enlisted son", and I immediately said no and cut off contact with them. Love the military, hate the recruiters
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    • The army recruiter at my school just flirts with the hottest girls he can find.
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    • I only want to enlist to Space Force.
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    • I thought my Marine recruiter was bad about lying. Then I saw how much Army recruiters straight up lie. I once read an article about an Army recruiter in my home town printing a fake contract saying the kid would get a Challenger for graduating boot camp to get him to enlist.
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    • The army dudes were at my HS yesterday trying to get kids into colleges for some service. My grandpa is afraid of Trees and slanty eyed people I dont need to continue the PTSD tradition
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    • Recruiters used into classrooms and gym classes to watch. Two weeks in they were looking for me and then when I came back to school after my dad was diagnosed with a huge brain tumor (he later died of), they asked why I was gone since I never skip days. I was called a pussy for my eyes watering up
      funnyonah 13 apr
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    • "Sorry I'm allergic to crayons
      Liamaster 13 apr
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    • Ignore recruiters, do your own research if it interests you.
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    • I'm looking to join the Army. Just have to get In shape, but my motivation has been lower than my grandfather's balls. Don't know why either, used to work out alot. Anyone have any advice? And don't say "Hur dur just go".
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    • I'm retarded.
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    • Don’t instantly join, please do research and ignore the promises because chances are it’s only what they want you to hear.
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    • I got called once. Told them I have asthma and they haven’t called done since
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    • Low key the army is actually a huge help and gives thousands of kids in bad economic and family backgrounds who live in dead end towns a chance to leave and prosper in the world
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    • Army recruiter I went to school with did his recruitment speal to me several times. We were cool. One time he asked what I was doing after high school again and I said not joining the military kinda laughing with him. Another recruiter started yelling at me in the cafeteria about how I'm not worthy.
      rfhjxd 14 apr
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    • My recruiter said I could fly in the marines, he lied
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    • Recruiters are indeed assholes, he said it would be a fun summer vacation and now I’m 2 years in to the biggest mistake of my life
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    • All I can say is;never trust a word a recruiter tells you. They are paid to sign you up, not tell you the truth. Research everything they say, online.
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    • For the next great war, we should only recruit POC to fight as reparations to all the white people that died during both world wars.
      ECHO5ECHO 13 apr
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    • Tell them “it’s hard to suck a dick with my asthma”, and they won’t know what to do
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    • That’s a fact. I’m still in hs, graduating soon and military recruiters from different branches are there every day watching kids like hawks. Luckily for me, I haven’t been asked by any of them and I’m contracting with the army soon 🤷‍♂️
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    • I’m a big guy.. and no I’m not thicc... I’m just tall and bulky, I look buff at certain angles and afar but I’m not. And making eye contact with the army recruiter took about 20 minutes away from my life. “Dude I can’t join the military, half of my body is in plates and screws, I’m big by genetics”
      Omega1558 13 apr
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    • Then he says you can get pussy all over the world and you end up getting gang today by some marines in the shower
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    • Also when you tell them your going to college right after high school
      josilo 12 apr
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    • I don’t know what shit fucking recruiters you guys had but all of mine are phenomenal men. One almost literally gave me the shirt off his back so I could be properly dressed for meps
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    • This is facts. The US army underperformed in meeting the minimum number of recruits that they’re resorting to begging and even pulling this shit
      Bannables 15 apr
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    • You sign up, die for five years, get a camero and get married and then you die again.
      Binky 14 apr
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    • I spoke to an army recruiter my friend met and I have to say, I really got a desperate and hungry vibe from him. Seemed a bit obvious that it was solely for his own benefit
      Fabut 13 apr
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    • Marines invade. Army occupies. One is a surgical tool, the other is a blunt force. Like a rock being hurled by a retard.
      HangNazis 13 apr
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    • I have 89 days left in the Air Force before I get discharged ✈️
      Autos 13 apr
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    • “I said we have free college benefits, right... so stay here and listen to me pussy!”
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    • If your looking for workout advice just keep looking at yourself in the mirror every day and grab your fat and get mad that your not fit anymore and eventually you’ll wanna do something about it
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    • When you accidentally make eye contact with the army head hunters during your lunch break.
      KKoner 13 apr
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    • I was talking to our friendly neighborhood army recruiter when I was a JROTC Captain (college sophomore now) and this fucking overzealous army brat butted in outta nowhere, trying to find infractions on my uniform like he knew shit. The recruiter said that according to JROTC regulations 1/2
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    • The difference is after the Army you don't end up with $120,000 in debt and unable to find a job
      HurdSims 16 apr
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    • I'm actually kinda regretting not following through on some of the recruiters, no college debt and they don't put certified engineers anywhere near dangerous areas unless they absolutely have to. Unless it's the Navy or Airforce, they dont even really have dangerous areas for non pilots.
      Zenith12 14 apr
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    • Mine come to my school and give us waterbottels and pens
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    • They purposely target vulnerable high schools kids who don’t know what they’re doing with their lives. It’s sick to be honest.
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    • I've gotten 2 letters for the marines in the last 6 months
      Symphonee 14 apr
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    • Those ROTC kids come out of college and it’s huge dick energy, untill they meet their platoon sergeant who went to Afghanistan twice and doesn’t want to take shit from some guy who’s so new to the army doesn’t understand what a 5988 is.
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    • Robots are so scary imagine one just fucking breaking you like a god damn toothpick no problem rip your arms off and shit
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    • a recruiter followed me to my English class and as we got there he's like "yeah so can I have your name and number to enlist you" and I politely told him I was blind in my left eye and walked in my class room, I still feel rude to this day but it's been over two years since I was even in high school
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    • Had a recruiter come into my store the other day. Started talking about our day. I pretty much just said I was a broke tired college kid. He tried to slyly throw in how the military would pay for my college. Bitch. Im working 40 hours a week to pay for it. I dont need to sign off 4 years of my life
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    • I never had any negative experiences with mine. They told me exactly what to expect. Sure, they glorified marine culture and what not, but they never told me anything wasnt true and were honest about bootcamp and MCT.
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    • My highschool implemented a new thing this year where the entire senior class had to take the ASVAB I got an 82 on it now I got recruiters on my ass like a guys to a hot senior that got her nudes leaked
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    • The new Star Wars looks like absolute dogshit. Palpatine is dead, he is not alive. Darth Vader throw that mother fucker down a pit and exploded when hit a reactor.
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    • I can’t go to college because I didn’t turn in 1 assignment on time, meaning I got a C instead of a B. 79.27% in the class. My moms gonna kill me.
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    • Meanwhile air force recruiters aren't seen anywhere other than like science conventions, robotics competitions, and college career fairs
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    • Saying www is longer than saying World Wide Web
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    • They tried getting me to join cause apparently I did really good on their test my school made all seniors take and apparently I had like a really high score. I was like nah bruhv I’ll pass unless you make me like instant general
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    • Recruiters don’t care about you. They’re only doing their jobs which is recruiting. They might say a lie or to make you join the military or exaggerate a bit.
      Yatsuto 15 apr
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    • I’ve been fat my whole life, so they never said a word to me.
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    • When I got a email from an army recruiter I responded with USMC
      Seika 14 apr
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    • Nah fuck that. Semper fi or die
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    • I love and respect our military...just not recruiters.
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    • My recruiter was straight with me. I'm out now, though, and I do get 1700 a month to be in school.
      donotdie 13 apr
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    • Army recruiters are fuckin garbage
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    • Ben7798 13 apr
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    • Yeah here is some PTSD and the government not taking care of u after u get discharged
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    • U.S. when they find out a 3rd world country has oil
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    • Honestly, recruiters don't give a damn. They really fuckin dont
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    • A Navy recruiter called me a few days ago. Fucker was belligerent. I told him I was taking a gap year from college and that I'm a janitor at a local government office. I said I worked with some Navy guys and didn't like their uniforms. He kept persosting and I was like look bud, my boss is in the
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    • This movie was better than all the new ones combined
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    • (1/2): Marines kept calling me asking me to join. First time i told them i needed time and this was a big decision. Kept pestering me and calling me every 3 weeks. Finally as patient as i could be, told them I found a better employment opportunity (which was bs i needed to lie). They were like....
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    • I remember back in highschool a marine guy got hella pissed at me because I wouldn't say where I was from ... Like dude chill the fuck out ... Your job is to sign people up not asking what nationality they are
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    • Marine Corps in my case then next thing you know you’re an alcoholic lance corporal living the barracks living for the weekend
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    • I hat how some kids are like “Oh my gosshhhh what movie is this?” They don’t deserve the right to know.
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    • My friends made fun of me for going to a university and say it’s useless but all of them plan on joining the army or currently have manual labor / minimum wage jobs 🤔
      Buttapple 13 apr
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    • Join the military if you are poor or middle class, don’t join if you aren’t. Simple as that
      foxglove 12 apr
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    • The funniest shit was when i had a recruiter call me and i basically told him that going into the military would be terrible for my mental health being the type of person i am and all they could argue was they could pay for college
      Gunthar 12 apr
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    • Just tell them you’re trans.
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    • Legitimate question, how does the military afford to pay every enlisted person for college and even housing after they’re time in the military is over?
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    • How Red Cross be when they find out you are O-.
      Victorx 12 apr
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    • At my school they have a pull up bar st the booth for the army and I don’t give a fuck about them but I crank out like 78 pull ups to make them wish they had me then leave in silence
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    • A girl in class filled out a form from them about getting more info and being interested in joinin but she didnt pay attention to what the recruiter was saying and only heard "we can help pay for college"
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    • I kinda regret not going into the Air force
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    • Pretty much how it went down for a few of my friends.
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    • Reading through everyones posts seems like alot have had bad experiences with recruiters. I had a good experience with mine and he is now a family friend after I joined. So many job and education opportunities it's pretty nice. I'm an 88M and stationed in hawaii, it was pretty nice in my experience.
      GGFuckMe 17 apr
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    • Guacamole nigga penis
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    • My recruiter is one of the nicest people I have ever met and he genuinely cares about us. The other recruiters in our office are assholes and he doesn't get along with them for shit. Just find the right people
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    • koolkidv7 16 apr
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    • every time a recruiter tries to talk to me i give them a bullshit excuse that they can’t argue with. one dude tried to tell me there was no way i would be able to pay for my education, and i said i’m getting tons of scholarships and got a free ride. dude was silent after that.
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    • Never had to talk to a recruiter when I was graduating. Guess I lucked out
      Poortugal 15 apr
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    • This is like my least favorite Star Wars movie in the existence of ever. The only thing I enjoyed was Vader brutally murdering everyone at the end.
      SixxShot 14 apr
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    • Everyone here saying that marines are better. Your ass is going to want out after those first four years regardless of your choice
      Hygh5 14 apr
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    • Marine recruiter once yelled at me for not raising my hand when he asked who was interested in the marines because apparently marines can have any job I could want.
      rfhjxd 14 apr
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    • That's how they got me. Dont do it. The $3 discount isn't worth it
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    • I’m a female and one time a recruiter was asking me if I wanted to join and I said no and he kept pressing so I said I don’t wanna get today. He said well we have therapy for if that does happen
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    • The military is a fucking trap unless your strong minded enough
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    • Recruiter send me a text that was like 2 pages long.
      2rawwww 13 apr
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    • Love that movie so much
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