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RON SWANSON
QUOTES TO LIVE BY
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  • 378 comments

    • Give a man a fire, he'll be warm for a day... set a man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
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    • The bacon part always gets me because it almost sounds like he's robbing the guy
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    • I love this man
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    • Honestly he carried that show
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    • It’s just different office. But not as many teenage white girls watch parks and rec so it’s okay to like parks and rec.
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    • Such a smart man, also acceptable to cry after getting hit by a bus and at little Sebations funeral
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    • Remember the episode when we find out that Ron is super rich?
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    • That’s Duke Silver not Ron Swanson
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    • There is only one thing I hate more than lying; skim milk.
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    • The satire of the character really went over your heads huh?
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    • "History began on july 4 1776, everything before that was a mistake"
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    • Crying is acceptable at Lil Sebastians funeral.
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    • I wish Ron was my boss
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    • Shame the actor's not like that.
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    • Fun part is Ron(I forgot his real name) he actually plays the sax and he’s really fucking god at it
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    • Y'all shit on literally every show except parks and rec for being featured all the time
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    • i have cried two times in my life. once when i was run over by a truck, and when i heard that lil sebastian died
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    • The last one was beautiful
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    • "Dear Canada, go fuck yourself"
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    • Probably the best comedy show of all time in My opinion
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    • My favorite is probably, “If any of you need anything at all, too bad. Deal with your problems yourselves, like adults”
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    • I will say there is one other acceptable time to cry. That is the end of terminator 2
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    • Why'd you use Duke silver tho?
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    • Dear frozen yogurt, you are the celery of dessert. Be ice cream or be nothing.
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    • What about "dont half ass two things, whole ass one thing."
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    • Duke is a boss
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    • Godspeed.
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    • :)
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    • Ron Swanson is a good man, I’d like to shake his hand.
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    • Goodnight Sweet Prince
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    • Didn't Ron Swanson say "fish only for sport, fish isn't real meat" Lord something to that effect?
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    • RON SWANSON 2020 "FUCK THE GOVERNMENT "
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    • Ron Swanson 2020
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    • bruh if any regular customer asked me for all the bacon and eggs I’d give em what for BUT god damn Ron with that smooth tone you could have my bacon and eggs too bro
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    • Unpopular opinion- parks and rec is better than the office.
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    • Wise words from the master, black cat never shares his fish.
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    • I will work all day if it means nothing gets done
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    • I accidentally scrolled by to fast and this is what I heard. *smooth jazz plays in the background "give a man a fish"
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    • Everyone acts like he actually wrote the lines himself it's a fucking tv show
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    • I am unbelievably erect rn
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    • I was friends with one guy through college but I could never memorize his name. By the time I realized I should ask, it would have been extremely awkward
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    • Ron swanson is my spirit animal.
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    • For some reason I dont like the office or parks and rec and I don't know why
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    • It sucks that I'm allergic to eggs.
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    • What a guy...
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    • My eyes have been blessed
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    • I find it funny that people are trying to be like a character that is designed intentionally for us to laugh at
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    • The more I watch this i realize I am Ron Swanson, And I am okay with this
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    • content not available more
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    • I know what im made of
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    • Swussy got me acting strange
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    • content not available more
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    • Y'all know he's not real right?
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    • <-------- check my account😉
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    • That show is shit. The office is better... honestly, say yes to the dress is better than that shit
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    • All of you guys just blindly loving Ron shows that you don't really get the point of his character lmao. He's a huge hypocrite; an extreme libertarian who works for a government agency
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    • Too bad the Indian dude makes the show unwatchable
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    • That last one hit hard
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    • Hot take parks and rec is better than friends (and to me the office)
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    • Another feature
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    • The GOAT
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    • You forgot one
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    • Fishing is hard though
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    • Meh
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    • Nick Offerman was the theater kid of the family...his dad would kick your dad's ass
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    • Sad that nick offerman is a big liberal
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    • "Government is inefficient and should be dissolved"
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    • All the bacon and eggs you have.
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    • Slide in my dms for pics
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    • Yo eggs and hash browns and bacon is ultimate breakfast combo
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    • Why is the background corner gas in the beginning that’s Canada
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    • Send tit pics.
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    • I love him
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    • The part where you call somone by the wrong name just so they know you really dont care is just raw power.
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    • Honestly they should just do a show with the chronicles of Ron Swanson. Just have him doing manly things on tv. I’d watch that.
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    • I thought it was Ron Jeremy
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    • Literally everything is a weapon that folder in my hands is more dangerous than this bow in yours
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    • Everything he says is either brilliant words to live by or retarded bullshit that makes me question how he’s made it this far there is no in between with him
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    • Remember, Ron Swanson is what liberals think a libertarian really is... a harmless pseudo Republican
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    • More inspirational than Michael Scott any day
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    • Nick Offerman is an American Icon
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    • Ron Swanson damn near deserves his own show.
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    • Don’t half ass two things whole ass one thing
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    • One of my favorite quotes from Ron Swanson that nobody remembers is: "Of course I'd remarry. If you dont believe in love, what's the point in living?"
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    • Nick Offerman, Chris Pratt, and Rob Lowe fucking carried this show, Aziz Ansari and Aubrey Plaza did quite a bit too
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    • I know what I’m about son
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    • Ron Swanson 2020
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    • Yes
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    • Man of wisdom
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