wanted to be nice so I meowed back at my cat. Not sure of what I said, but she's been staring at me like this.
slumpkng
23 jun
wanted to be nice so I meowed back at my cat. Not sure of what I said, but she's been staring at me like this.
Someone will die.
SS
I Of fum.
Someone will die. SS I Of fum.
me whenever I hear a Red Hot Chili
Peppers song
SHUT UP ABOUT California
SHUT UP ABOUT California
NonSequitur1275 NonSequitur1275
22 sep 2020
me whenever I hear a Red Hot Chili Peppers song SHUT UP ABOUT California SHUT UP ABOUT California
The Babylon Bee
@TheBabylonBee
The Simpsons Will Now Only Use
Voice Actors Who Permanently
Dye Their Skin Yellow
BabylonBee BabylonBee
24 feb
The Babylon Bee @TheBabylonBee The Simpsons Will Now Only Use Voice Actors Who Permanently Dye Their Skin Yellow
Can't wait to be a father so I can randomly walk into my sons room and look at him like this
PiedPiper815 PiedPiper815
27 may
Can't wait to be a father so I can randomly walk into my sons room and look at him like this
5 Year Old Me: can't wait to grow up."
Adult Me:
SpareParts SpareParts
23 oct 2020
5 Year Old Me: can't wait to grow up." Adult Me:
The Carolina dog is a feral dog breed native to the
Southeastern United States. DNA analysis suggests that they may have descended from the first canines that arrived in North America with the primitive humans who migrated from Asia across the Bering land bridge thousands of years ago.
DailyFacts DailyFacts
28 sep 2020
The Carolina dog is a feral dog breed native to the Southeastern United States. DNA analysis suggests that they may have descended from the first canines that arrived in North America with the primitive humans who migrated from Asia across the Bering land bridge thousands of years ago.
Post Malone is proof that women will think any dude is "fine" just so long as he's famous.
Ladies you can find you a Post Malone working in the kitchen of almost any restaurant if you are serious about getting you one.
dumnull dumnull
6 nov 2020
Post Malone is proof that women will think any dude is "fine" just so long as he's famous. Ladies you can find you a Post Malone working in the kitchen of almost any restaurant if you are serious about getting you one.
leturns off the big fan because it's too loud.
Everyone else in the helicopter:
NerdyGirl21 NerdyGirl21
5 feb
leturns off the big fan because it's too loud. Everyone else in the helicopter:
day *eats cake*
Me: Sleeps with her sister
Her:
The_Kraken124 The_Kraken124
23 oct 2020
day *eats cake* Me: Sleeps with her sister Her:
World's oldest person
breaks her own record by turning 117
That's lot of dam iis
Flamineous Flamineous
10 nov 2020
World's oldest person breaks her own record by turning 117 That's lot of dam iis
WHEN YOU ALREADY STARTED EATING
AND SOMEONE SAYS
"LETS PRAY"
bennxtt bennxtt
15 feb
WHEN YOU ALREADY STARTED EATING AND SOMEONE SAYS "LETS PRAY"
Dogs are for people Who want
Worshipped be like Gods
AWe
Cats are for people strong enough to have a God standing on their chest at 5 AM demanding a sacrifice
Psherman42WalabyWay Psherman42WalabyWay
26 sep 2020
Dogs are for people Who want Worshipped be like Gods AWe Cats are for people strong enough to have a God standing on their chest at 5 AM demanding a sacrifice
Divorce selfie!
I ieee
GodToddHoward GodToddHoward
11 may
Divorce selfie! I ieee
kdot
@just_kdot
if my sleep schedule was a person
PM - - Twitter for iPhone
TommyG_MVP TommyG_MVP
24 sep 2020
kdot @just_kdot if my sleep schedule was a person PM - - Twitter for iPhone
When she calls you trash, so you find someone that actually cares for you
When she calls you trash, so you find someone that actually cares for you
averagefairy
why do they even sell phone screen cleaning wipes haven't you ever heard of rubbing your phone on your boob til it's clean? you can't sell me anything more effective than my own tiddy
averagefairy why do they even sell phone screen cleaning wipes haven't you ever heard of rubbing your phone on your boob til it's clean? you can't sell me anything more effective than my own tiddy
Lovely dog
sm
morbidXprincess morbidXprincess
5 apr
Lovely dog sm
This is my son's friend Jarod.
Before I hear any wise cracks. Jared has been fighting lung cancer and we almost lost him. He was recently cleared to workout. Today his arm measured 8 inches and his legs just over 12". and he's at ZERO % body fat. I'm taking him under my wing. Stay tuned for
Jared's progress.
We will watch your career with qreatanterest
Frighten
24 sep 2020
This is my son's friend Jarod. Before I hear any wise cracks. Jared has been fighting lung cancer and we almost lost him. He was recently cleared to workout. Today his arm measured 8 inches and his legs just over 12". and he's at ZERO % body fat. I'm taking him under my wing. Stay tuned for Jared's progress. We will watch your career with qreatanterest