• x bransonreese
THE fERSOW NO DISCOVERED SHARKS Branson
Tae cono
into THE
tus erat,
Smooth
Ltous nec
EATING mE
a notcaycepollard
the twitter thread the artist created after
this was one of the best situations i have
ever seen in my whole life:
My Work Here ts Done ohiyiseradone Apes
'As velaransovba into Rave touched dozens of sar wth my Bar
hands. Everyone tad very ough ski, Ike medium sanpape.
BRANS © Novransomese Apes
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  • 1512 comments

    • Shark b8 hoo ha ha
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    • The resilience of that bait, holy shit that’s impressive
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    • The number of people that just couldn’t grasp the concept of someone fucking with them is astounding and hilarious. Also, sharks are so smooth, they’re already your stepdad.
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    • I’M A MARINE BIOLOGIST, proceeds to argue with obvious bait. Kinda cringe
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    • Smooth shark army rise up
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    • Sharks may not be smooth, but these guys’s brains are.
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    • imagine being unable to tell this guy's joking AND believing you're the intelligent one while arguing with him. incredible
      Neskah 7 jul
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    • This was just a really long troll post where someone perfectly described what a troll is at the end and also described their best victims perfectly
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    • A crusader for shark smoothness
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    • Sharks are smooth, source: bro trust me
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    • Sharks are smooth like your brain
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    • Taking b8 to the next level
      iguano 7 jul
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    • I can’t believe nobody realized it was b8, I’m almost glad to be on iFunny because at least it made me self aware lmao
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    • I trust the superior marine biologist
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    • I feel like there should be a name for that kind of thing. It happens frequently enough
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    • bait at the highest level, fucking beautiful
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    • Its shocking that nobody on Ifunny wants to read long form stuff then acts like an expert in everything. Makes you wonder what sorts of other things they arent reading because it's too long
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    • I love how long he dragged that out for.
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    • Sharks are actually smooth though, everyone else was just trolling smh
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    • Master baiters
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    • Sharkive can you believe some people think sharks are rough like sandpaper
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    • Ifunny has trained me well to see bait, but this is a whole other level of stupidity falling for that bait
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    • Rub head to tail, smooth. Tail to head, rough af. Source: I've dissected a shark.
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    • Took me a minute to realize it was bait
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    • Does anyone read all this shit?
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    • Why do most of you seem proud of the fact you refuse to read anything longer than a tweets length?
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    • You expect me to read all that?
      Jimbus 7 jul
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    • Too long didn't cum
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    • I’m not reading that
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    • Fucking love Branson Reese, he makes great comics, hes a great social activist, and runs an awesome podcast, and I'm in his discord
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    • What a waste of fucking time. Stupid ass post
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    • I don't know about sharks, but have swam with both sting rays and sharks (didn't get to touch the sharks as they were a bit more skittish of people surprisingly) and let me tell you, rays are like blubbery kind of smooth, it feels very slimey, but not like mucus slime, more like exposed tissue slime
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    • What makes it even funnier is he was talking about the sharks being "visibly" smooth ( especially compared to a lion) so he was correct in his statement lol
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    • The people getting baited have brains as smooth as shark skin
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    • All of Twitter displayed in one post
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    • Well probably no one in this entire thread is correct. Sharks don't have "skin" they have microscopic plates called dermal denticles which are made of the same material as our fingernails and have small, pointy tips. (1/2)
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    • Damn you guys really are illiterate. "tl;dr" like you actually just didn't read something because it was too long and would hurt your wittle itty bitty brain. You guys were the kids to sound out every word reading aloud in 3rd grade weren't you?
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    • Imagine thinking sharks have scales. Obviously they have corn kernels. Sharkive
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    • I will describe how smooth sharks are in my first reply
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    • Had a teacher do something like this to a friend of mine. He would intentionally mispronounce words or tell a story from history ass backwards and my friends would constantly try to correct him. The teacher would stick to it as straight faced as can be, then when my friend was red in the face angry
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    • Yo Sharkive can confirm?
      MrTurtle 7 jul
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    • Smooth brains
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    • Sharpeedos have the ability Rough Skin. Checkmate, Brans n.
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    • This is a certified Smooth Shark Moment
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    • Mark Twain described something like this in "the Innocents abroad" where the travelers continually screw with the tour guide in Italy by pretending to know nothing about history and repeatedly asking "is he dead?" When any historical figure is mentioned
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    • "You saw them incorrectly" really got me
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    • You can pet the black cat, unlike the shark's sandpaper flesh, the black cat's fur is the closest one to silk.
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    • Man I fucking love sharks they’re so damn awesome almost every species of shark is just amazing in different ways fuck people who don’t appreciate sharks
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    • could’ve just said sea lions and gotten away with it, them’s some mean-ass fuckers
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    • denticles
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    • Where is that picture of the jester sitting on the fence taunting a bunch of dogs below him?
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    • One of the funniest things Ive seen in collective tbh
      sojynxy 7 jul
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    • Smooth, especially the Carlos Santana and Rob Thomas reference.
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    • Beautiful
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    • Same energy as that Tumblr thread of the dude talking about fucking people’s military wives
      Woopus 7 jul
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    • Cool but who the fuck cares whether or not a shark's skin is smooth? Why does it even matter ffs
      HaraKirix 10 jul
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    • This was beautiful
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    • sharks are smooth though?
      Kasagure 7 jul
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    • This is how the media works.
      stuffj 7 jul
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    • I feel ashamed I’ve fallen for these kinds of tricks before
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    • Im as smooth as sharks
      ensentry 7 jul
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    • Heyyyy I’m a smooth shark. B)
      Bargo_ 8 jul
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    • This is like every trumper lost in denial that he's not a total douchewagon.
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    • Can someone sum this up for me?
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    • Guys sharks are smooth I'm the shark I know, but the one thing more smooth than my skin is some booty from a thicc chick
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    • I love how LONG after he was very clearly fucking with people that Tumblr decided they had a shot at convincing him that sharks aren't smooth
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    • The last part simplified: Troll - a person who pretends to know what they are talking about to annoy ppl who know what they’re talking about. Tumblrtards are so pretentious they think other ppl being right is wrong
      GrandJ 7 jul
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    • I don’t see the value in being a dumbass on purpose, you’re just making the world a worse place
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    • Tldr
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    • Tl;dr. Can someone summarize?
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    • Twitter/Reddit will find anything to argue about. You could post a how to video on changing your oil and the comments would have an arguement on what soup is best
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    • I beat up a guy like that in middle school
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    • SO ARE SHARKS SMOOTH OR NO I MUST KNOW
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    • Lol when you think being a marine biologist makes you an expert in shark skin. Bitch I can go catch one whenever I want and I’m just the town crackhead. Can confirm they’re smooth bois. Source: being the town crackhead
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    • Yes its bait, but this is how flat earth and anti-vax shit started
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    • artist is immature, time to never support him ever again
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    • You could fund cabellas for an entire year with the amount of bait they took
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    • God I love doing this kinda shit. Several of my friends at school always gotta be the smartest person and I just say some retarded shit and stand by it just to see their reactions and my god some of it is comedy gold
      Shniddle 10 jul
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    • Wow its almost like that's exactly how trolling works. Incredible how someone needs to explain that hes fucking with people.
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    • Ok but what if some are smooth, and some are rough?
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    • People would rather feel right than to feel happy...
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    • God that’s beautiful lol
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    • He’s unmovable
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    • This thread was super long and I didn’t feel like reading it but it has funny vibes so I’ll leave a like.
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    • This post proves that most twitter and tumblr users will instantly fall for 100% of all bait on ifunny and it’s kinda sad
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    • Good meme all around
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    • Sharks are smooth like jazz
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    • Shussy
      RatFacts 10 jul
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    • Did... did no one assume that he was calling it smooth because sharks look smooth. I mean if I was getting murdered I wouldnt be cuddling with the murderer
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    • The hard part about b8 this good are the people that would just pull the "next you'll say you were just pretending to be retarded" foiling all of your plans.
      Parzival 10 jul
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    • Superior marine biologist
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    • *dermal denticles*
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    • I don't know why everyone is mad my pet shark is maximum smooth
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    • I think that guys was having fun being a dumbass lol. I mean think about it. You baffle professionals just to fuck with them😂
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    • SHARKS ARE SMOOTH
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    • So if sharks did have smooth skin, they'd have no friction and be faster in the water? So God nerfed sharks for being to powerful?
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    • Did not read
      Memenigi 10 jul
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    • Sharks are so smooth they stole my Girl😔
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    • He was trolling the fuck out of them
      McStanky 10 jul
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