Atheists when they realise they watched Godfather instead of
Sciencefather
sooperdood3 sooperdood3
22 jan 2021
Atheists when they realise they watched Godfather instead of Sciencefather
How the gun shop worker stares when he overhears a woman Say it's her first time shopping for a gun by the revolver display section.
@firearmchronicles
AdaptiveCombatRifle AdaptiveCombatRifle
7 dec 2020
How the gun shop worker stares when he overhears a woman Say it's her first time shopping for a gun by the revolver display section. @firearmchronicles
Do y'all ever get pre-annoyed? Like you already know someone is about to piss you off.
MishkaMushkaMickeyMouse MishkaMushkaMickeyMouse
5 nov 2020
Do y'all ever get pre-annoyed? Like you already know someone is about to piss you off.
i hav dog in cup
> iS
yeetis_the_fetus yeetis_the_fetus
22 sep 2020
i hav dog in cup > iS
harvard graduate
my gf: he's so immature think i'm gonna dump him
her friend: ya remember when he got excited that he could drink 2 capri suns at once
[i walk in holding 3 capri suns] babe you're not gonna fuckin believe this
- 03 Nov 19 Twitter for iPhone
864 7,190
post_pro_millennial post_pro_millennial
28 sep 2020
harvard graduate my gf: he's so immature think i'm gonna dump him her friend: ya remember when he got excited that he could drink 2 capri suns at once [i walk in holding 3 capri suns] babe you're not gonna fuckin believe this - 03 Nov 19 Twitter for iPhone 864 7,190
When you see Superman using the car you're still making payments on as a weapon:
AriesL AriesL
27 jan
When you see Superman using the car you're still making payments on as a weapon:
My girlfriend knows how much I love soccer. She sent me a picture of a graffiti mural of my favorite player, Diego Maradona, in Naples.
tart_wallstreetbets tart_wallstreetbets
2 mar
My girlfriend knows how much I love soccer. She sent me a picture of a graffiti mural of my favorite player, Diego Maradona, in Naples.
Please show me your feet
TwistKyber TwistKyber
5 nov 2020
Please show me your feet
To the man who was in my house and robbed me.
Keep the cash, and my DSLR. and whatever you took. But if you have the memory from the camera, please. it has photos
ot my dog's Last day alive on it. cannot
ace those photos, Please throw it onte,
Or put it in the mail slot. OF j
Toronto, Ontane
ot
Be She died a few days fcann
Teet, lose those photos as well
To the man who was in my house and robbed me. Keep the cash, and my DSLR. and whatever you took. But if you have the memory from the camera, please. it has photos ot my dog's Last day alive on it. cannot ace those photos, Please throw it onte, Or put it in the mail slot. OF j Toronto, Ontane ot Be She died a few days fcann Teet, lose those photos as well
This is really
ENE
heavy!!
Yesss! Now I
need one more
hing...
This is your life now. Chained at my feet like DOG!
OhYeahLordGalvatron OhYeahLordGalvatron
24 sep 2020
This is really ENE heavy!! Yesss! Now I need one more hing... This is your life now. Chained at my feet like DOG!
MS? got a loose tooth!"
MOM: "let's wait until it falls off naturally"
dad:
MS? got a loose tooth!" MOM: "let's wait until it falls off naturally" dad:
When your boyfriend is accusing you of cheating and you're standing there thinking he's starting to sound
just like your husband
DaddyCatfish DaddyCatfish
4 oct 2020
When your boyfriend is accusing you of cheating and you're standing there thinking he's starting to sound just like your husband
This is a Weiner Retriever, just like your mom
@TwunkTheTwink
CarsonArnold CarsonArnold
22 jun
This is a Weiner Retriever, just like your mom @TwunkTheTwink
When your parents tell you not to have sex before marriage but you're standing in their wedding picture
When your parents tell you not to have sex before marriage but you're standing in their wedding picture
Captain America always looks like a bird just flew away with his hot dog
Captain America always looks like a bird just flew away with his hot dog
To be honest.
don't even know...
why I became famous.
placid_supre_2 placid_supre_2
20 oct 2020
To be honest. don't even know... why I became famous.
Happy Easter!
Happy Easter!
Mary Margaret: *churns butter real slow with her ankles out*
Jebadiah:
Tabby Tabby
19 oct 2020
Mary Margaret: *churns butter real slow with her ankles out* Jebadiah: