• So, my stepson has a girl upstairs in his room that stayed the night and my wife doesn't know yet. I'm curious on how he plans to smuggle her out now that the whole familv is awake.“
    smile 163K

    • Oscillation
      What a roller coaster. Why can’t we read things like this in English instead of Shakespeare or some bullshit.
      smile 3.6K reply 75
    • SavannahWilliams
      90% sure this woman already knew this and didn't care enough to say anything moms know everything just because they don't mention they know don't mean they don't know
      smile 17 reply 3
    • ziltch0
      ziltch0 24d
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    • StonedPussy
      Dude was probably reading his step dads tweets the entire time
      smile 14
    • ToastedToPerfection
      ok boys, so there’s this girl i really fucking like, and i need some fucking help. so basically, we facetime every night for hours, and she always tells me how much she enjoys talking to me and how i’m a greta person, but ion know if she like me like that, help please
      smile 13 reply 14
    • Xarxes
      Dad silently cheering his son on
      Xarxes 24d
      smile 13
    • afro_guy1899
      That’s a better love story than twilight
      smile 12
    • liamts79
      smile 12
    • No_Nudes_Here
      Step dad in his head: it would be a real dick move to ask who's white shoes those are. A real dick move.
      smile 12
    • Tmizzil202
      I normally don’t read all of that but that was entertaining lol
      smile 11
    • julbaby
      Lmao two types of parents
      julbaby 23d
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    • oddpast_oddfuture
      Imagine the carnage if it was the daughter with a boy over
      smile 11 reply 1
    • bamb00zled_
      I don’t have a hot girl as my pic so I won’t get tc
      smile 11
    • NoWeebs23
      That was actually really fun to read
      smile 10
    • _Zach_
      Damn. This man needs to fucking write books for a living
      _Zach_ 22d
      smile 10
    • ShovelKnight
      Remember Snake, this is a stealth mission
      smile 10
    • Bropez
      Bropez 24d
      smile 10
    • GalaxyAtomics
      Still a better love story than Twilight
      smile 10
    • TheTsarofAll
      Escort mission
      smile 10
    • unassist
      Not the stepdad we asked for, but the stepdad we all deserve
      smile 9
    • Honor_Reign
      This is the kind of father I want to be.
      smile 9
    • RandaJo
      If mama bear was cleaning that hard-core, she already knew. She just wanted to calm down so she didn't end up killing both of them. He'll be getting the talking to when he gets home, guaranteed. And don't come over here telling me "but they're 18." You live with your parents, you live by their rules
      RandaJo 23d
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    • Memes_Anime
      “Fuck fest” 😂💀
      smile 9
    • DinoDan7345
      best dad ever
      smile 9
    • gifmun
      Hol up he says “he” left at the end......was his friend a guy.......
      gifmun 24d
      smile 9 reply 3
    • UnKnowAbleForce
      Wow. Is this a normal parent? My parents completely crippled my social life out of fear I may have sex or do dangerous things.
      smile 9 reply 5
    • IDontPostAnythingGoAway
      10/10 wife 0/10 mom
      smile 9
    • Awkward_Doge
      Russian is just upside down English
      smile 9
    • Kylebubby
      His wife is cleaning the entire house while he tweets about his stepson. And they say chivalry is dead.
      smile 9 reply 1
    • Frisco_1630
      The mom if she found out about the girl.
      smile 9
    • XEcchiDemonX
      I felt like i was there
      smile 9
    • Sympathetic_Devil
      Update, wife got Twitter and followed me, he has to move out by the end of the month
      smile 9 reply 2
    • psychoticnightmare
      "4 am fuck fest"
      smile 8 reply 1
    • specialdarks
      “That fuck fest at 4am”
      smile 8
    • Aleksandro2
      I know it's natural and shit but am i the only one that thinks that talking about your kids fucking is kinda weird?
      smile 8 reply 4
    • TheIronConduit
      I would just love to mention that through all of this, his Twitter Handle is "DropsNoPanties"
      smile 8 reply 1
    • cappiam
      Don’t know about you guys, but I’m a bit disappointed he didn’t get caught. That might just be because I wanted see how the stepfather would tweet it.
      cappiam 24d
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    • joshdiesel
      Ugh. 18 year olds having sneaky “fuck fests” and I’m still waiting on my first kiss in years as a 40 year old virgin. God damn it. I didn’t need to be reminded of how lonely I am.
      smile 8 reply 2
    • _MSU_DET_GR_195
      And the winner of the 2019 stepdad of the year award goes to...
      smile 9 reply 2
    • Fat_Spazzerman
      So in short—- son brings his closest friend, who is a girl😏, overnight. They do the fuck, and now await a good chance to sneak the girl outta the house next morning without mum noticing. They succeed 😎👌
      smile 9
    • MaasawDreamt
      Closest friends? He busted out of the friend zone!
      smile 8 reply 1
    • MANDO316
      So isn’t he snitching by putting this on Twitter where the mom will eventually see it.
      smile 8
    • TheFourtyTwo
      I want to know the story of how he smashed one of his closest friends. Escaping the friend zone like that is legendary
      smile 8 reply 3
    • Imagine_Waggins
      That was beautiful
      smile 8
    • ImHookedMrKrabs
      I thought most parents only cared about daughters having sex
      smile 8 reply 2
    • stumpypkasma
      A true brother in arms
      smile 8
    • Flakko26
      10/10 good read, would recommend
      smile 8
    • AlliGH
      Jimmy got away with it, until mom found dad's tweets about the whole damn thing
      AlliGH 21d
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    • sidneydrake
      Why would he just lay in bed listening to his son fuck... I'd be like "get the fuck out of here you children!"
      smile 7
    • Beastmode1928
      That poll had 300k votes wtf
      smile 7 reply 1
    • itsurrboi
      He a grown ass 18 yr old but he ain’t allowed to make his own decisions?
      smile 7 reply 4
    • funnyone05
      Congrats to the dude who just got a date ⬆️ hope I can work up the courage to ask my crush out too 😂
      smile 7
    • kabob
      Since when is an 18 year old a “grown ass man.” If he was a grown ass man he wouldn’t need to hide her in the first place lol
      kabob 23d
      smile 8 reply 1
    • hamburgerdog25
      "We live and die by our choices" fucking dead
      smile 7
      Me the whole time
      smile 7
    • JustReactionImages
      The best kind of stepdad, minding his own damn business but still enjoying himself
      smile 8
    • AceofJacks
      This will probably be the best thing I read all day 😂 Thank you
      smile 7
    • Tsumaki
      That tread was fuckin epic, I wish more of these kinda threads were posted here, I bet its hella hard to find a Gem like this Amongst all of Awful Virtue Signaling Asshole Lefty SJWs competing for top Victim Status, Since when was being a Victim the cool thing these people aspire to be I dont get it
      Tsumaki 24d
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    • misteryman321
      That has to be the chillest dad I've ever met. I aspire to be him.
      smile 7
    • darksiders_death
      So his wife was cleaning the house and that dude didn't even help out? Where is Karen at?
      smile 8 reply 2
    • Army_Memes
      One time when I was 17 I snuck my gf in. My room was in the basement and I had to get her out of the house with both parents upstairs at the time. I somehow someway got her to fit in a big duffle bag💀😂 if she had her knees to her chest. So my dumbass carries this big ass duffle bag out the house.
      smile 7 reply 7
    • Mike_Shinoda
      I don’t care if it’s real or not because it’s funny as fuck and hits close to home
      smile 7
    • GRUNT4500
      Now that’s a supportive father lol
      smile 7
    • CurryinaHurry
      If I ever get married I'm calling my wife "the wife"
      smile 7
    • aubz98
      More suspenseful than birdbox
      aubz98 24d
      smile 7 reply 1
    • blyatifull
      This is the dad who is a good man and follows the bro code
      smile 7
    • I_just_comment_
      9 months later....
      smile 7
    • SizzlinBacon
      Twist ending... she knew the whole time
      smile 7 reply 2
    • adamc0909
      I lost it when he said the fuck fest above us at 4 am
      smile 7
    • eroticogothic
      $1000 says mom knew and cared exactly as little as dad did, and he spent all that time getting played
      smile 7 reply 1
    • AndalBrask
      Damn, that fucking kid has no fear of death.
      smile 7
    • BrutallyHonestMan
      I don't know about y'all, but I was fucking invested in this shit.
      smile 7
    • johnny0342
      That wouldn’t work out with me because my mom would bust into my room and force me to help her clean
      smile 7 reply 1
    • Draygon_RL
      Looking at your reflection in the black phone screen
      smile 7 reply 1
    • NovaEagle_USMC_DTOM
      Father of the year lmao
      smile 7
    • Erm2001
      My mom monitors me, even if I'm all by myself and nothing is happening
      Erm2001 24d
      smile 7
    • Mia223
      I need to say something via the internet ...it’s something I needed to say for a long time
      Mia223 24d
      smile 7 reply 5
    • Headlesshollows
      I love how he said “the fuck fest above our heads at 4am”
      smile 7
    • YeetHub
      As an 18 year old, trust me, an 18 year old is NOT a "grown ass man", just an awkward teenage/adult hybrid who isn't really either one.
      YeetHub 23d
      smile 6
    • MikTheArtist
      If you read the whole thing, I’m proud of you.
      smile 6
    • _Tekashi_6ix9ine_
      Well wont the mom see this when she goes on Twitter?
      smile 6 reply 3
    • whatifiwasblackandfunny
      Damn this dad is chill af
      smile 6
    • amicusnole
      Good for him. Escaped the friend zone, got a knowing wink from dad, AND escaped the lecture by mom. All around success.
      smile 6
    • Guilherme_11
      Finally some good fucking post
      smile 6
    • AwesomeHAB
      I haven't seen a worthy feature in a while
      smile 6
    • Za_heven21_dwel
      Best show I've seen
      smile 6
    • rockennumgent
      Infinity war < this thread
      smile 6
    • lilmac__two
      One time, my parents came home while I had a girl in the basement. I tried to sneak her through the basement’s back door by putting her in a bag but she was too heavy. So I took off my clothes and had her put them on so that she looked like me. I told her to run down the street but my parents follow
      smile 7 reply 4
    • NoVox
      Dad's a fuckin legend , my respect.
      NoVox 24d
      smile 7
    • aphilion
      Parenting done right
      smile 6
    • goku713
      Great fucking story better than bird box
      goku713 24d
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    • snakeheart
      I wish I could do more than a like. This was a roller coaster ride until the end. I’m happy I read the whole thing.
      smile 6
    • you_whoosh_you_lose
      This is amazing. Stepdad of the year. Young love wins. Also, why this dude talk like a black Man? Haja.
      smile 6
    • Arbucklet
      I'm just gonna say it, this dad is a mad lad, what a badass. Parenting 100.
      smile 6
    • viper7210
      #Still a better love story than Twilight
      smile 6
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