• 321 comments

    • I could tell teachers, instructors, and co-workers by the way their keys sounded
      1.8K 36
    • Now you’re thinking with portals.
      957 8
    • If you can’t tell who it is by their footsteps (their pace, how heavy the step is, and where it’s comin from) then they ain’t your family
      McNerls 16d
      6
    • Probably rapid, loud steps as i sprint up the steps three at a time and a loud thud followed by limping footsteps as I go flying into the bookcase for the sixth time today
      5
    • I know when my dad is coming because I can hear the belt
      _Lucoa_ 17d
      5
    • I’d definitely be able to pick out my own. I’m the only person in my family whose ankles crack like 40times every step
      4
    • You can tell them apart, but the question is can you put your dick away, close 5 porn tabs, and act natural before you get caught?
      4 4
    • My wife told me, the dog could hear my truck from 10 blocks away she would run upstairs and dance by the kitchen door for 5 minutes before I pulled in the driveway
      srrcc 16d
      5 1
    • Knowing the sound of footsteps being near or far really comes in handy whenever I masturbate
      4
    • I could tell mine, cause I’d just hear a giant crash from me busting my ass on the stairs
      4
    • I'd be scared too if I heard someone barreling up the stairs like an absolute mad lad.
      4
    • In second grade I was playing heads up seven up and this girl put my thumb down and I thought it was the special kid so when I told her I thought it was him, she was like “yeah that was on purpose”. This girl can fake Down Syndrome without being seen or heard, if that’s not acting idk what is
      4
    • Apparently I don’t make much noise when walking up the stairs. I always scare the shit of my family
      4
    • I step on one step and then jump down the rest. Fuck stairs
      00w00 17d
      4 1
    • Mine sound like, step, step, boom, crash, and ah fuck my leg. Cause I hate stairs and for some reason always fall
      4 1
    • My parents took the stairs away because I am grounded
      4
    • My brother stomps everywhere, my grandma makes shuffling noises, my mom is quiet, and I am fast as fuck. I just bolt my ass around the house.
      3
    • I tip toe up the stairs becuase I don't like making noise and it feels faster
      3
    • My dad has heavy and slow steps, my mom has light and slow, my brother has heavy and fast, and my sister just fuckin speed demons her way up the stairs
      3
    • *hears rapid thumping of crawling up stairs on all fours*
      TGbrony 16d
      3
    • As a night owl I’ve learned the ability “hush” my footsteps doesn’t make any noise. Unless I’m high then I can’t really tell
      3 1
    • I have begun to take huge hops up the stairs instead of steps
      juke119 17d
      3
    • My bros ankle pops every time he steps which makes it really easy
      3
    • I was home alone and I was downstairs in the kitchen and I heard what sounded like footsteps coming down stairs and I was terrified and I grabbed a knife turns out to be the noise of the heater
      3
    • I wouldn't hear my footsteps. I try to walk as quietly as possible. My little sister on the other hand, walks around like an angry elephant. Fucking STOMP STOMP STOMP all the damn time.
      3 2
    • If I hear someone going up stairs in my house I'm burning down the place. It's a single story house, and we ain't got no basement
      3
    • I’m too poor to have stairs
      3
    • I frequently scare my family when I go up the stairs cause everyone is loud as hell in my house but I'm quiet as fuck in everything I do
      dannokk 17d
      3
    • Aaaah, it’s because Spongebob wants to drive the boat!
      2 1
    • I never hear my footsteps cause I learned to walk silently to sneak in the kitchen and get food
      2 1
    • I don’t know, I’m kinda quiet and random. Sometimes it’s three at once, sometimes I run up each individual step and sometimes I try to make as little noise as possible.
      2
    • I run up the stairs as fast as I can on all fours
      2
    • What would yall do if you met your clone. They think, know, & look just like you
      2 2
    • My house is on a concrete slab, with padded carpet. My 210 pound self can sprint in the house and nobody could hear it. Which is why I don’t oil my doors.
      2
    • I wouldnt have problems, its time to either kick my own ass because the bitch has it coming, or fuck myself... Or both simultaneously
      2
    • Literately no one here’s my footsteps. For some reason I just naturally make no sound and I can scare people shitless easily.
      2 2
    • I know which member of my family enters my house by listening to the keys Mom= small sound. Brother = Big sound. Dad = enters backdoor since nobody goes there
      2
    • Reminds me of the creepy pasta where the dude's mom asks for help with the groceries and as he's walking to the kitchen his mother pulls him into the closet from behind, puts her hand over puts her hand over his mouth and says that she heard it too.
      2 1
    • You’re right. I walk very quietly. So much so that I sneak up on my car on accident
      2
    • I can tell who’s home by how hard the door gets slammed.
      2
    • My footsteps have no sound..
      2
    • I wore heels to school almost everyday my senior year and so I eventually got the nickname “Heels” by one of our cool janitors. Didn’t know I had the nickname until about a week ago when I went back to visit because my sister works there.
      2
    • Yoo I WALK ON THE EDGES. It's the quietest way
      An_gel 17d
      2
    • "GOD DAMMIT CLONE, NOT AGAIN! I TOLD YOU TO SAY SOMETHING! NO MORE HALLWAY FOR YOU!"
      2
    • "My pale twin got out again!"
      2 1
    • I know my footsteps because my shoes have a grip pattern on the bottom that make me sound like fucking squidward so its either me or squidward and i doubt the latter
      Rexxor 17d
      2
    • I can recognize mine because I’m fat and I go hella fast. The only other place u could hear sounds like that was nam
      2
    • Why is another us so creepy? There's something eerie about it
      2
    • I’m too poor to have a house with stairs
      2
    • You can tell there mine because you’ll usually hear a crash then a loud “F*CK”
      2
    • I don't make noise when I step
      2
    • You could fuck yourself
      2
    • My dog knows footsteps well. If she doesnt recognize the steps, she will sprint towards the stairscase to determine who the fuck is there and bark at them. Shes never done this except for a new person who visits
      1
    • To this day I still know my dad's key jingle. Other day at work I hear it and I was really confused but I turned to check and there he was, bringing me lunch apparently.
      1
    • would think I live with 5 elephants
      1
    • My twin and I sound the same running up or down stairs, we recorded and tested it out
      1
    • It’s called tardy ears and it’s a real dysfunction where you hear the reverberations of sounds way later
      1
    • I would because I slam my heels into the ground when I walk cause I think it sounds cool
      1
    • Yup, this is how i would sneak around the house whenever needed
      1
    • Im like that with my dogs. One comes down very quickly, one comes down an average speed and the other takes one step at a time
      1
    • id probably recognize my own footsteps, since my ankles make snapping sound with every step
      1
    • No I would here one loud this as I jump down all 18 steps
      1
    • It's more like just listening to how big the booms are in the steps and estimating weight
      1
    • Can anyone else hear your mother's keys and know it's her right away??
      1
    • So ifunny is just tumblr now?
      zeemaxx 16d
      1
    • That's like how I can tell without looking which one of my 3 dogs jumps onto my bed by the weight they put onto the mattress
      1
    • When my last dog went blind, he could tell when we came home by the sound of our car engine. We had 3 different cars
      1 1
    • Or the most equal fight!
      1 1
    • My grandma is really slow up stairs, you can hear her finger nails scraping the bannister
      1 1
    • Yeah...real bigger problems man...lol lol
      1
    • He sounds like hes loadinh a double barrel shotgun in a dark closet while saying this
      1
    • Or maybe they mean if someone recorded all the step sounds each person makes and you wouldn't be able to know your own not that a fucking clone is coming for you.
      1
    • My sister would fall up the stairs every morning
      1
    • See I wouldn’t know if I’m coming because I make it a point to walk completely silently in my house
      1
    • Well you definitely wouldn’t have bigger problems on your feet
      Tpyo 17d
      1
    • I can tell which of my four cats is which based on the tone of whatever meow i hear. And match individual sneezes to my family members, but the meows happen more often.
      1
    • That’s cuz ya nigga climbing up the stairs on all fours
      1
    • Is that me...is that me stronger then me,???? I'll fucking kill me
      1
    • I was watching forensic files and this girl said she heard her parents come up the steps and they said that she wouldn’t know the difference and I know for a fact that’s a lie
      1
    • My footsteps are silent soo
      1
    • we kkks can tell when colored ppl are around by their skin
      1 1
    • If I payed attention to my parents step pattern by the time I'd recognized which parent I'd be caught beating my meat
      1
    • I rECKON THATS TRUE
      1
    • I got full on all fours animal style because I’m an alpha
      1 1
    • Don't know about going up stairs. But I think I would recognize two light thumps followed immediately with a loud boom and even more rapid thuds careening downward
      1
    • I walk silently, so I couldn't anyways
      1
    • I can tell which friend is pulling into the parking lot by the sound of their exhaust
      1
    • I have a pegleg I'd know
      1
    • *Jordan Peele has entered the chat*
      ThatNut 17d
      1
    • I can recognize everyone but my dad because some how he doesnt make a damn sound hes silent the whole way up
      1 1
    • Even though I'm 6'4" and weigh 235 I barely make any noise walking even with boots on
      1
    • I’m the only one in my house who walks two steps at a time so I think I could figure it out
      1
    • My copy is finally back with the mf chips
      1
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