• Saying
"it's time to get ready for
bed"
-childish
Saying "and now
I must attend to my
evening affairs"
-mysterious debonair
-you sound
like you know what
brandy is
18 Nov 19° Twitter for iPhone
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  • 358 comments

    • I know what brandy is. Shes a fine girl. What a good wife she would be
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    • Or my favorite “if you’ll excuse me your mother is going to suck me good and hard through my jorts”
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    • My evening affairs include eating beans in bed
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    • Well, if you’re poor, that’ll come off barshit crazy, you need to be rich so people will say you’re eccentric and your study reeks of mahogany
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    • I will now commit non consciousness
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    • Now Brandy wears a braided chain made of finest silver from the North of Spain. A locket, that bears the name of a man that Brandy loved. He came on a summer's day bringing gifts from far away. But he made it clear that he couldn't stay; no harbor was his home.
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    • If someone tells me that I’ll just assume they bout to jerk off
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    • Brandy is like a whiskey. Both are made the exact same way. The only difference is what the mash is made of. Brandy is made from fruits. Right now I'm making a brandy from wild blackberries in my yard.
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    • Hey guys I’m getting some “quality” shelves from Wayfair. Y’all need anything?
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    • As opposed to my morning infidelities
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    • You also sound like an 80 year old woman who’s grandson doesn’t call her anymore because she lectures him every time he calls
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    • It could also mean you're off to perform your ritualistic masturbation sesh in the shower while thinking about your crush and crying uncontrollably until the things that live in the void and feed off your sadness are satiated. So mysterious! Anyway, drink deep dark ones; your foretold return is nigh
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    • I already know what Brandy is, she’s a fine girl
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    • What is brandy
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    • I must depart my dears, but fear not, for the sun will rise again.
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    • Everyone knows what Brandy is once they reach a certain age
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    • I've heard brandy is a fine girl
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    • Also sounds like you've been watching too much Black Butler
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    • 5 knuckle shuffle
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    • If I say I have to attend my evening affairs, my family already knows I'm going to beat my meat. So I gotta alternate what I say
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    • Isn’t Brandy kinda like whine but not aged as long?
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    • Ah yes, along with dark lunch at about 3 am
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    • My friends would probably think I'm talking about wanking
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    • Ya best get a saddlin' lest ye injans getcha I reckon there be sum moonshine over yonder buckle ya boots and holler if ya in hot water
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    • Brandy extra fermented wine for those that dont know
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    • I put brandy in my cookies
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    • Evening affairs 😏ahh So the Mrs is calling you hmm
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    • Sounds like you gonna asphyxia masturbate but in a smoking jacket
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    • Brandy is the cheap mans alcohol
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    • brandy is distilled wine, sometimes aged in casks.
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    • Sorry, it's my bed time.
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    • We are two mariners, our ships soul survivors
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    • Cockamole
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    • For those wondering, brandy is an off-brand coniac (no idea how to spell it in english)
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    • What is Brandy?
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    • Ah yes brandy, I definitely know what that is I feel it every morning
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    • You left out *you sound like a douche bag.
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    • Fuckin good, that's what brandy is
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    • "I must slumber to ready for tomorrow. Farewell."
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    • Means you’re cheating because it’s an evening affair
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    • I know what Brandy is. She’s a bitch.
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    • Brandy is fun
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    • Yuck brandy
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    • My evening affairs: *furiously masturbate, then browse electronic devices a little before assuming sleep.*
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    • Brandy is not terrific
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    • retire for the evening in my study
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    • Time to enter the s l o o p z o n e
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    • Brandy is a fine girl. Oh what a good wife she would be. But my life, my love, and my lady is the sea
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    • Deboner
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    • I’ve always heard that term when someone knows there’s a woman in their bed
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    • Yea, I know Brandy, she's that chick in the trailer park with no teeth on food stamps
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    • It SOUNDS like, you’re going to go touch yourself before bed
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    • Say: “I’m going to fucking sleep.” -straight to the point -shows you don’t wanna be disturbed
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    • Yeah! WTF is brandy anyway?
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    • I slept with a girl named brandy once. She wasnt very mysterious
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    • sounds british and that's just.... ew
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    • Wwtf is brandy
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    • Who's Brandy?
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    • Whats a brandy
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    • Brandy is a fine girl
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    • Wtf.. who doesn’t know what brandy is??
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    • Ah yes mr whilmington fresh biscuits will be made in the morning toodles
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    • So quirky
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    • “Please ignore my further absence, for I must enter the land of sweet Zim zuzzy.”
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    • Brandy is distilled wine. When made in the Cognac region of France it is known as Cognac. Think of Hennessy and Remy Martin. All Cognacs are Brandy but not all Brandy's are Cognacs.
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    • Deboner
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    • Brandy is my evening affair
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    • brandy love’s dick
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    • I actually have 1/3 bottle of Brandy left on the island in my kitchen.
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    • You mean fire water?
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    • Brandy is a liquor made from fruit
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    • it sound like you're going to masturbate
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    • I say “I’m about to shut it down
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    • I kno what brandy is, she was my first love and she has ifunny too, maybe she'll see this, maybe not who knows
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    • Or it’s nappy time :)
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    • Evening affairs includes jerking off
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    • What's brandy
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    • 5:50 am, i have been playing rocket league for 12 hours straight. I went from gold 3 division 4 to bronze 1 division 3. I won 20 games and lost 12.
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    • Who tf doesn’t know what brandy is? You all know cognac but not brandy.
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    • If you say “It’s time to get ready for bed” and you’re not talking to children then you’re just a weirdo
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    • I tell my boyfriend it's cuddle time when I want to go to bed.
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    • I'm eating beef jerky and drinking root beer in bed
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    • Brandy was a dog that was trapped on an island with a bunny named Mr. Whiskers.
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    • Who the hell is Brandy?
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    • Mm quite exquisite my dear
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    • That font is gross. Only psychopaths use that font.
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    • Sounds like you’re just excusing yourself to go masterbait
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    • Both are way to say you're going on ifunny for next 3 hours
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    • Time to awaken’t
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    • I’m just so unhappy with life rn I wanna be happy like how I used to be
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    • Sounds like you’re going to beat the fuck out of your dick and literally nothing else
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    • Do i smell a repost?
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    • I’m going to commit awaken’t
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    • I will begin the activity of intensely studying my eyelids for 8 hours
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    • You sound like a dumbass neckbeard
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    • Brandy is like whiskey but instead of using grains they use fruit. My great grandpa used to make it in his shed.
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    • Brandy is a slut and I don't forgive her. Give me back my dog
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