• nightingalerising
DY keunkopussirotta
ancient human: Oh hi plant, what happens if I eat
you?
poisonous plant: You'll shit yourself until you die
ancient human: Oh. But what if I eat like, just a tiny bit of you? Just one drop of your juices or
something?
poisonous plant, now visibly confused: You'll. uh.
Shit yourself just a little bit?
ancient human: Oh cool. Hey people, I found a
medicine plant for constipation!
medicine plant: Fuck.
Source: keuhkopussirotta
80 notes >
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  • 318 comments

    • Sucks that we evolved to longer be able to talk to plants
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    • Medicine is just finding things that noon viruses and bacteria faster than they noon you.
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    • Plant pussy call it the Pussy
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    • The difference between most medicine and poison is the dosage
      No0o0o0 5 sep
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    • I like that the name changed to medicine plant
      946 Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
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    • I mean every plant that is useful to humans immediately becomes more successful as we spread it around water it and protect it from predators.
      751 Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
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    • Sucks that we no longer have the freedom to use any plant we need in order to improve our health.
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    • I mean, just don’t have poison
      584 Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
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    • Hey little brown and blue mushroom what happens if I eat you? *becomes one with astral plane*
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    • 381 Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
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    • Yay for living through discovery!
      14 Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
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    • Wish there was a plant that’d suck my weewee
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    • Whyd I read this as planet instead of plant?
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    • More like if I eat a tiny bit, I don't die, but I fuckin trip balls
      Cacaonut 5 sep
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    • Every plants dream is to become desired by humans, every plant we even remotely enjoy spreads around the world
      8 Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
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    • What plant is this
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    • should've called it shit plant.
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    • Even worse, some plants have defense mechanisms that we use as seasoning. Or better. I dunno, both I guess.
      Crujido 5 sep
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    • I like that it changed from poisonous plant to medicine plant it’s the little things
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    • I like the idea of just seeing a plant visibly confused
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    • Dude old medicine used to be like legitimately witchcraft type materials. Isn’t the history of Advil basically that people would strip some bark from willow trees and eat/consume them somehow for their opiatic properties?
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    • ayo this plant makes you take a fat dump
      Socket 4 sep
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    • content not available more
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    • 2 Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
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    • Thought it was gona be talking about coffee for a sec
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    • What if early humans had allergies and when they went to eat shit they would die, so people would stay away from said food. Do you know how much food is probably missing from the earth thanks to those ooga booga bastards?
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    • Whats funny is that this might actually be the case with Vervain (Verbena) since its got tons of weird qualities but is also an Abortificient
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    • I just eat the plant, I'm built different
      horsefly 5 sep
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    • I like how it's name changes
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    • I love that the name of the plant changed
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    • Weed
      dj_408 5 sep
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    • 1 Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
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    • Exlax if anyone want to know
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    • 3 Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
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    • Grung eat plant, grung feel funny, grung meet god, grung creates religion
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    • What if I suck those pink things on that cow over there, oh wow that white stuff tastes good!
      Spunder 8 sep
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    • My dumbass thought it said poisonous planet I was Hella confused
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    • Is it just me, or does being called "ancient human" sound low key kinda badass?
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    • I wonder what plant they ate to be able to talk to plants
      MANTA_ 7 sep
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    • On the bright side this plant won’t have to worry about survival cause humans will be taking care of it and it’s bloodline
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    • My nephue ate pokeweed berries yesterday.
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    • The difference between medicine and poison is usually in the dose. It's taken us a long time to get the dosage right for a lot of our common medicines but we've done it.
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    • Medicine in a nut shell
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    • Yup, just like how blood thinning medications are watered down eat poison
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    • Pussy willow plant is tylenol
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    • New name n everything
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    • deja vu
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    • Visibly confused
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    • I thought it said planet and I was so confused
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    • What happens if I eat this fungus, you get super food poisoning and shut yourself to you die. Cool what jf I eat 3.5grams. You'll trip absolute sack brosik
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    • I love that it changed to medicine plant
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    • Galaxy brain moment
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    • Thought it was gonna be about datura lol
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    • Torille
      V1tunpr0 6 sep
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    • Laxatives?
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    • I thought that said planet
      Red9 6 sep
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    • Nice
      NiceCube 6 sep
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    • Man, they really did not care
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    • Vvvvg
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    • Changed from poison plant to medicine plant. Kinda funny
      Tom_Nook 6 sep
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    • What's great is that we are discovering that bigger plants like trees experience thought in their own way and we could possibly communicate with them one day using Science
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    • This actually worked in the plant's favour as now humans have caused the plants to continue their lineages and spread far further in a much shorter time
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    • I just drink on pickle juice and a quarter gallon of milk
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    • FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND FINLAND
      HeHy 6 sep
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    • Turmeric, Ginseng, Ginger, and Garlic can all help you
      Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
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    • Top ten character arcs. Poisonous plant —> medicine plant
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    • Hello tab of acid what happens when I eat you
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    • I like how it turned into “medicine plant” afterwards
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    • I love this
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    • I like how it changes from "poisonous plant" to "medicine plant" at the end. Nice little detail.
      CodyBill 5 sep
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    • Castor bean
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    • I like that it changed to medicine plant
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    • I imagine an early Neanderthal discovering shrooms and having the best fuckin oonga boonga of his life
      deepoh88 5 sep
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    • how can a plant be visibly confused
      Kyreli 5 sep
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    • Now which plant did you eat that makes you talk to plants?
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    • This dude on twitch is streaming, every follow he chugs a beer, terriblemic is the name
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    • So take things in moderation? Got it
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    • "Youll shit yourself until you die >:C"
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    • Senna be like
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    • Wh0a
      Marcelus 5 sep
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    • Yo ancient humans could talk to plants
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    • now the plant gets to be carried by humans and farmed. he should be happy.
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    • Need me some of that
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