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    • Your son is Ron Swanson.
      PLANTboi 5 apr
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    • Bacon the candy of meats
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    • It's because they don't feed him, so he worked hard so he can finally eat
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    • kanep0e 11 apr
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    • "BACON IS GOOD FOR ME"
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    • Unpopular opinion: bacon has its place in things but the hype it gets is underserved; sue me
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    • Vegans be like:
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    • I told my daughter she could have any toy she wanted for getting good feedback from her pre k teacher and being advanced. I tried to buy her a 200 dollar dollhouse. She just wanted two small packs of playdoh.
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    • 5
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    • I added Ron Swanson. You’re welcome.
      _Nadiki_ 8 apr
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    • Did he eat it or beat it?
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    • When you are a decent parent and reward your children for their accomplishments instead of demonizing them for their mistakes.
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    • Damn that’s like a whole 5 slices.
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    • You only realized just then he was yours? Were you unsure? Did another man creampie your wife?
      Lkm106 9 apr
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    • 4
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    • I’ve never gotten anything for having a good report card, it’s just expected of me
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    • “Come on sweetie, hold the bacon for the camera. We need to get the perfect shot so I can make a funny post on twitter and try and find some meaning in my empty life”
      Kaoruko 8 apr
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    • I'm glad to see that they're rewarding the kid for doing good. We need more supportive parents and I feel like this/my generation is going to be amazing at it. At least half of us are.
      AshCat 8 apr
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    • Bacon is hella overrated 🤔
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    • I got bacon a can of spray cheese with a bunch of ritzs for Christmas one time and I couldn't have been happier
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    • Your son is gonna grow up to be a macho redneck Libertarian patriot
      3
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    • 3
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    • Well... at least he didn’t get hand lotion...
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    • Imagine getting rewarded for good grades
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    • Your son's going to grow up to the stereotypical dad with a huge beer belly
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    • I had straight A's for years and all i got was "Good job. Now go wash the dishes then cook."
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    • Wait people actually got rewarded for that shit? I never got anything even on my graduation.
      DEDDED 8 apr
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    • Bacon is overrated. Change my mind
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    • I get a good report card every cycle for the past 10 god damned years, I ask for shit “You have a house, boom”
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    • Your son is american
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    • Someone's going to be fat later in life
      BigTyrone 11 apr
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    • Is it just me or do I feel like bacon is better by itself? I still love it on things but at the same time I feel like hm this would be better on the side rather then on a burger for example.
      TieGuard 11 apr
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    • tbh bacon is kinda nasty
      lilfatty 11 apr
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    • My parents don’t get me shit for getting all As
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    • One summer i made 3 lbs of bacon in a day & ate it with half a gallon of milk. My family tried doing it as well & all got heart burn.
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    • My feet meat hurt
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    • Nigga gonna get high colessterall disease and die
      2
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    • L I K E F A T H E R L I K E S O N
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    • Lil nigga got a pussy pocket. That's how I knew he was mine.
      2
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    • Smart one he is.
      2
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    • Nah bro lots of dudes like bacon...Jody loves bacon actually
      2
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    • If its vegan bacon throw him out
      2
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    • Bruh that was me when i was a kid. If i got to go like pick out a toy or something id be like nah i want a whole box of chicken strips to myself.
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    • ^ i didn’t know it was npf day
      Meh_heM 9 apr
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    • Mmmmmmmmm bacon 🥓
      mylife59 9 apr
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    • Don't you hate it when I funny crashes when you find a remotely interesting feature, that could or could not be funny and has potental, but you'll never see it again because you see some dude saying chicken looks like a vagina or a voiceover goose yelling at cows?
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    • Thick cut, your boy knows his shit
      2
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    • They should have showed him how the bacon was made first, at the slaughterhouse to work up his little appetite.
      2
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    • So you had doubts he wasn’t your son?
      E_V_I_L 9 apr
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    • Food is temporary fuel to be turned to shit. An intellectual like myself would choose an item in which I will derive much more use and joy from. Did I mention I watch Rick and morty?
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    • nice thick cut too
      1vs7 9 apr
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    • So you didn’t know for sure when he came out of your vagina
      2
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    • I wish I was rewarded for doing what I was supposed to
      Fabler 8 apr
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    • If it’s not at least 30% something that used to have a face, then it’s just a snack
      2
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    • I was never rewarded for good grades, even when I got nearly straight “A”s from Kindergarten through my senior year in high school. Additionally, I was ALWAYS reprimanded for getting anything below a “B” grade. Parents threatened to sell all my belongings and punish me further. Thanks, parents.
      Quarrel 8 apr
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    • Soo.... you weren’t sure he was your son before that?
      2
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    • Lol bacon I’m so quirky
      IsmaeI 8 apr
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    • Used to get paid for straight As. Once my parents realized that I always got straight As, they stopped being proud and started getting mad when I didn’t have 100s. People don’t reward their for the norm, they reward them when they exceed the norm. That pushes the kids who have hit the top limit down
      3
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    • When youre so obsessed with food you realize you could have gotten a PS4
      scup247 8 apr
      2
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    • Why stop at 3
      2
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    • Kilos 8 apr
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    • Shleagan 8 apr
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    • Shleagan 8 apr
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    • 2
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    • Oh I have made poor choices on rewards when I was younger...I should have picked bacon!
      1
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    • Bacon is extremely overrated
      oh_when 13 apr
      2
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    • She was in doubt even though he came outta her vagina
      1
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    • Perfect. Now put your meat inside of me big boy
      Bipology 12 apr
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    • Dude I love bacon. But i wouldnt ger 3 fuckin pounds of it
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    • So there was doubt until now?
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    • 1
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    • Do normal people not buy that much bacon?
      1
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    • Bacon lowkey a little overrated. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a very good breakfast food and great on burgers, but the internet holds it in way too high of regards, so much so that it dampens my overall opinion of the food as a whole
      3
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    • Trump: The art of bacon
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    • Just finished cooking bacon
      1
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    • How to make sure a kid is American step 1. Get good grades Step 2. Ask for bacon
      peewee14 9 apr
      1
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    • I can’t wrap my mind around this kid? Normal children would ask for toys or consoles but bacon. Damn
      2
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    • Hey son hold this
      1
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    • Bacon ain’t cheap either, one pound is at least 4-7$ depending on the brand
      1
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    • That shits not cheap either
      1
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    • My unpopular opinion: bacon isnt even all that good and I don't see why everyone obsesses over it
      2
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    • Good boy
      1
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    • unpopular opinion: bacon is overrated. don’t get me wrong, it’s good, but not as good as y’all make it out to be.
      2
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    • fuckin fatass bro
      sy_nth 9 apr
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    • The kids a genius in more ways than one...
      1
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    • Every time I get a good report card they just tell me good job
      1
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    • Mine wanted a triple cheeseburger
      Rando1ph 9 apr
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    • Outstanding move
      1
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    • You're getting presents while I get my ass beat for getting good grades
      1
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    • Yeah but that's incest
      1
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    • You fuck your son?
      2
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    • Wait you guys are getting payed
      1
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    • *American anthem intensifies*
      1
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    • Cuse tards have tards
      1
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    • I smell PETA coming
      1
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