Me: *Gets mugged by a hot lady in the alley
Cops: Do you remember anything about the robber?
TITTIES, YES I REMEMBER,
imminentSpillednut imminentSpillednut
12 jan 2021
Me: *Gets mugged by a hot lady in the alley Cops: Do you remember anything about the robber? TITTIES, YES I REMEMBER,
When you pull out the weed and she pulls out the meth.
Oh... you do drugs drugs.
When you pull out the weed and she pulls out the meth. Oh... you do drugs drugs.
me sliding the straw in and
out of a McDonald's cup
SarahWhyTho SarahWhyTho
3 mar
me sliding the straw in and out of a McDonald's cup
Mike Tyson, enjoying powdered donuts at a house party in 1988.
this_app_blows this_app_blows
8 dec 2020
Mike Tyson, enjoying powdered donuts at a house party in 1988.
Train up a child in the
way he should go, and
when he is old he will not depart from it.
PROVERBS
JesusIsLord JesusIsLord
30 sep 2020
Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it. PROVERBS
Send me nudes when you get home so I know you're safe
Send me nudes when you get home so I know you're safe
6 year old me at Zam debating if i should hold my piss in till morning or run down the hall and risk an attack from a demon
nuzzles nuzzles
25 sep 2020
6 year old me at Zam debating if i should hold my piss in till morning or run down the hall and risk an attack from a demon
POV: You ask Jesus for ice cream but he reminds
you of your sins
POV: You ask Jesus for ice cream but he reminds you of your sins
People with pocket knives looking at a box that could easily be opened with your hands:
Vaudevillain Vaudevillain
19 may
People with pocket knives looking at a box that could easily be opened with your hands:
One of the rarest dog breeds in the world, the
Tibetan mastiff can grow up to 2.7 feet in height and weigh up to 198 lb. These huge dogs can be
super expensive, and a puppy was sold for $2
million in China back in 2014.
AM3RICA AM3RICA
27 sep 2020
One of the rarest dog breeds in the world, the Tibetan mastiff can grow up to 2.7 feet in height and weigh up to 198 lb. These huge dogs can be super expensive, and a puppy was sold for $2 million in China back in 2014.
Who are you calling a cootie Queen?
YOU LINT LICKER
Tabby Tabby
15 oct 2020
Who are you calling a cootie Queen? YOU LINT LICKER
nell. mone
fayaplaya_
Man said u look like shrek when he was Savi
Fiona
SN
_Chongyun _Chongyun
25 mar
nell. mone fayaplaya_ Man said u look like shrek when he was Savi Fiona SN
My big toe after putting on a ripped sock:
TrenDerX472 TrenDerX472
13 mar
My big toe after putting on a ripped sock:
im darth maul. cause when you find me there will only be hi
Maul
WRONG HALF!
Darth Maul
Ryuuthered Ryuuthered
26 sep 2020
im darth maul. cause when you find me there will only be hi Maul WRONG HALF! Darth Maul
"You attract what you fear"
Oh my god! I'm so scared of being hot! Ha!
RES
can't believed that worked!
"You attract what you fear" Oh my god! I'm so scared of being hot! Ha! RES can't believed that worked!
Tupperware after you put spaghetti in it .
mamaHen mamaHen
10 oct 2020
Tupperware after you put spaghetti in it .
Me: Is about to leave a bench
Person: *Sits next to me*
Me waiting a few extra minutes before leaving so I don't hurt the persons feelings:
AgeekableGirl97 AgeekableGirl97
5 mar
Me: Is about to leave a bench Person: *Sits next to me* Me waiting a few extra minutes before leaving so I don't hurt the persons feelings:
I think I watched the wrong star wars movie
IT'S WAY BETTER THAN THE REAL ONE
Voracious_Beaver Voracious_Beaver
3 mar
I think I watched the wrong star wars movie IT'S WAY BETTER THAN THE REAL ONE
When You Get A Invite From
A Friend Who Is Always
Appearing Offline
Well, well, well, if it ain't the Invisible Cunt
DaJuulBoi DaJuulBoi
13 oct 2020
When You Get A Invite From A Friend Who Is Always Appearing Offline Well, well, well, if it ain't the Invisible Cunt
God: Congratulations on making it this far into 2020. Your reward is
Steve in Smash and Minecraft Cave update.
The remaining 20% of the human population:
Whine Whine
5 oct 2020
God: Congratulations on making it this far into 2020. Your reward is Steve in Smash and Minecraft Cave update. The remaining 20% of the human population:
When someone gets loud with you and you thinking about unleashing every single one of your inner demons
rbob1 rbob1
28 dec 2020
When someone gets loud with you and you thinking about unleashing every single one of your inner demons