Me about to say "happy 25th birthday" to the attractive, 45-year old recent divorce in the office
OsamaBinHarden OsamaBinHarden
30 dec 2020
Me about to say "happy 25th birthday" to the attractive, 45-year old recent divorce in the office
Construction guy: Have you seen my brick
Me:
txt2speech
16 jun
Construction guy: Have you seen my brick Me:
Thats him, thats the kid that picks
on me
redldue redldue
23 sep 2020
Thats him, thats the kid that picks on me
When Jesus hits me with the Holy
love and forgivness:
*Incoherent sobbing*
When Jesus hits me with the Holy love and forgivness: *Incoherent sobbing*
When you accidentally catch your little
Hulkster in your zipper.
The_Beard The_Beard
28 jan
When you accidentally catch your little Hulkster in your zipper.
Puppy born with a mustache
little olier now, still rocking the stache
Piiper Piiper
27 sep 2020
Puppy born with a mustache little olier now, still rocking the stache
Netflix: Are you still watching?
Somebody's daughter:
EdDboi5 EdDboi5
18 may
Netflix: Are you still watching? Somebody's daughter:
When you're feeling sad and your Meme friend pulls out their phone.
When you're feeling sad and your Meme friend pulls out their phone.
Nobody:
That one dude in a zombie movie that gets
bit and tries to hide it from rest of the crew:
TomSwellick TomSwellick
8 jan 2021
Nobody: That one dude in a zombie movie that gets bit and tries to hide it from rest of the crew:
ME: LET ME SEE THAT KITTY HER:
thegay0ne thegay0ne
11 feb
ME: LET ME SEE THAT KITTY HER:
did u take care of urself today? eat something? drink water? do something that makes u happy? allowed urself to feel whatever ur feeling?? huh?? do it
did u take care of urself today? eat something? drink water? do something that makes u happy? allowed urself to feel whatever ur feeling?? huh?? do it
When she sends a nude and it looks like Chewbacca got shot in the face
DaddyWolf78 DaddyWolf78
7 oct 2020
When she sends a nude and it looks like Chewbacca got shot in the face
celtic
glumshoe
fugdamatriarchy
failnation
My captain friend sent me this photo. Saudi prince bought ticket for his 80 hawks
I Nice
Apparently falcon passports are a mandatory thing throughout Arabia
You have to appreciate the irony of birds on an airplane
celtic glumshoe fugdamatriarchy failnation My captain friend sent me this photo. Saudi prince bought ticket for his 80 hawks I Nice Apparently falcon passports are a mandatory thing throughout Arabia You have to appreciate the irony of birds on an airplane
Guy Fieri slathers BBQ sauce on a bullet. He loads it, and puts the gun in his mouth. "One last trip", he whispers,
"to Flavortown."
daddyairplane daddyairplane
28 jan
Guy Fieri slathers BBQ sauce on a bullet. He loads it, and puts the gun in his mouth. "One last trip", he whispers, "to Flavortown."
Friend: "how do you have nice stuff whilst being paid on minimum wage?"
is crime,
Me:
Friend: "how do you have nice stuff whilst being paid on minimum wage?" is crime, Me:
Millennials "You don't understand how bad words hurt!!"
Literally everyone born before 1995:
CU_rcwalsh1942 CU_rcwalsh1942
22 jun
Millennials "You don't understand how bad words hurt!!" Literally everyone born before 1995:
The robber in my house watching me dead sprint at him naked with a tomahawk.
OrangeCokeGang OrangeCokeGang
6 apr
The robber in my house watching me dead sprint at him naked with a tomahawk.
someone said gospel music is just diss tracks for satan
someone said gospel music is just diss tracks for satan
harvard graduate
my gf: he's so immature think i'm gonna dump him
her friend: ya remember when he got excited that he could drink 2 capri suns at once
[i walk in holding 3 capri suns] babe you're not gonna fuckin believe this
- 03 Nov 19 Twitter for iPhone
864 7,190
post_pro_millennial post_pro_millennial
28 sep 2020
harvard graduate my gf: he's so immature think i'm gonna dump him her friend: ya remember when he got excited that he could drink 2 capri suns at once [i walk in holding 3 capri suns] babe you're not gonna fuckin believe this - 03 Nov 19 Twitter for iPhone 864 7,190
Dad telling me not to shake the chair when he's changing the light bulb
The_Meme_Guy1 The_Meme_Guy1
25 may
Dad telling me not to shake the chair when he's changing the light bulb
think frogs are the best animals because they go boing and ribbit"
think frogs are the best animals because they go boing and ribbit"