[first day as a mugger] me: *points gun* gimme all your money guy: please, I have kids
me: nah i'd rather have the money
kennugly kennugly
19 jan 2021
[first day as a mugger] me: *points gun* gimme all your money guy: please, I have kids me: nah i'd rather have the money
USA: Open your borders to us so that we could trade
Japan: No
USA: *Brings out the Navy*
I said we trade tod
history_memelord history_memelord
27 dec 2020
USA: Open your borders to us so that we could trade Japan: No USA: *Brings out the Navy* I said we trade tod
Is there such thing as too much?
hurt_meme_dealerexe hurt_meme_dealerexe
26 feb
Is there such thing as too much?
A Father-To-Be Died While
Building A Gender-Reveal
Device That Exploded
Tasneem Nashrulla
Mocita
24 feb
A Father-To-Be Died While Building A Gender-Reveal Device That Exploded Tasneem Nashrulla
SYGMOND THE GREY: A REALLY EPIC CAT BRACE YOURSELVES
IS COMING
KingGalaxy KingGalaxy
24 sep 2020
SYGMOND THE GREY: A REALLY EPIC CAT BRACE YOURSELVES IS COMING
When your parents tell you no jumping on the bed but you hear them doing it at 2 am
When your parents tell you no jumping on the bed but you hear them doing it at 2 am
When the hospital bills are expensive, but so are funerals.
You won't let me live: You Won't let me die.
Beunique
3 jun
When the hospital bills are expensive, but so are funerals. You won't let me live: You Won't let me die.
not show it
i've elf. completely im given up on im elt. im tired of acting to like im cry or even thoug h i want fo cry or
kaylaliv15 kaylaliv15
18 jan 2021
not show it i've elf. completely im given up on im elt. im tired of acting to like im cry or even thoug h i want fo cry or
When she pulls down my boxers
and sees what I'm packing
Less than half of what l'd hoped for.
Feasty_y Feasty_y
5 feb
When she pulls down my boxers and sees what I'm packing Less than half of what l'd hoped for.
vegans when they realize they are made of meat
nh03 nh03
29 oct 2020
vegans when they realize they are made of meat
When you see Superman using the car you're still making payments on as a weapon:
AriesL AriesL
27 jan 2021
When you see Superman using the car you're still making payments on as a weapon:
TIL Costco's hot dog has remained $1.50 since it was first introduced in 1984. After the company president complained they were losing money on it, CEO Jim Sinegal
put his foot down. "If you raise [the price of] the effing hot dog, will kill you,"
Sinegal said.
TIL Costco's hot dog has remained $1.50 since it was first introduced in 1984. After the company president complained they were losing money on it, CEO Jim Sinegal put his foot down. "If you raise [the price of] the effing hot dog, will kill you," Sinegal said.
when I'm on my third "mhm" and they just keep talking
when I'm on my third "mhm" and they just keep talking
You wanna sit on a frozen lake for hours
freeze our asses off, smell like fish, drink cheap beer, and not catch shit
You
SlimFresh69 SlimFresh69
24 sep 2020
You wanna sit on a frozen lake for hours freeze our asses off, smell like fish, drink cheap beer, and not catch shit You
When the teacher already yelled I at you and your classmate but then the joke kicks a second time
Kenzie_OP Kenzie_OP
12 mar
When the teacher already yelled I at you and your classmate but then the joke kicks a second time
think my cat is trying to summon a demon
Skywood416 Skywood416
24 sep 2020
think my cat is trying to summon a demon
When I'm alone with my thoughts:
Oh God. stuck with the weirdo.
staples1724 staples1724
3 jan 2021
When I'm alone with my thoughts: Oh God. stuck with the weirdo.
"Your biggest supporter is a stranger.
Your biggest hater is someone you know."
- Heath Ledger
magyaroxcy magyaroxcy
11 may
"Your biggest supporter is a stranger. Your biggest hater is someone you know." - Heath Ledger
Mr. House watching The Courier hack into the penthouse terminal holding a golf club
Lonethefox Lonethefox
18 feb
Mr. House watching The Courier hack into the penthouse terminal holding a golf club