don't let guys treat you like free salsa, you are guac
babygirl
don't let guys treat you like free salsa, you are guac babygirl
When she likes sitting on our face but also has emmroids real bad...
When she likes sitting on our face but also has emmroids real bad...
Big Bird informs Elmo that he's in the wrong motherfucking neighborhood
Republished Republished
23 sep 2020
Big Bird informs Elmo that he's in the wrong motherfucking neighborhood
When I'm given verbal instructions
Can you tihe part ofthe stuff where you all about (hings?
kingofsamoa kingofsamoa
27 jan 2021
When I'm given verbal instructions Can you tihe part ofthe stuff where you all about (hings?
College students during the Vietnam
War trying to keep their grades high enough so they don't get drafted:
I'm Studying or my fucking life
Rustypug Rustypug
28 dec 2020
College students during the Vietnam War trying to keep their grades high enough so they don't get drafted: I'm Studying or my fucking life
"uses my thumbs to lift my bra straps like an old timey political man would with his suspenders* im the mayor of titty city, bitch
124,602 notes
awfulPage awfulPage
11d
"uses my thumbs to lift my bra straps like an old timey political man would with his suspenders* im the mayor of titty city, bitch 124,602 notes
Dad: *pumping gas*
Mom: The smell of this gas is giving me a headache
Me in the back seat:
TheBoss420 TheBoss420
5 mar
Dad: *pumping gas* Mom: The smell of this gas is giving me a headache Me in the back seat:
My mom was so strict, I told my friends she said "no" even though I never asked Imao
AM - - Twitter for iPhone
OE ame
ame
eyes eyes
27 sep 2020
My mom was so strict, I told my friends she said "no" even though I never asked Imao AM - - Twitter for iPhone OE ame ame
You may be a man, but you'll never be this man.
La
m_o_n_k_e m_o_n_k_e
2 jun
You may be a man, but you'll never be this man. La
Michael Margolis
@yipe
Alexa: remind me to feed the baby
Defeat
the
Skrappy Skrappy
25 nov 2020
Michael Margolis @yipe Alexa: remind me to feed the baby Defeat the
DID YOU KNOW?
Al Capone started one of America's first soup kitchens during the Great Depression. By 1931, The Chicago
Tribune reported that the Capone Free Soup Kitchen served over 120,000 meals every single day. Many
Chicagoans credit Capone with doing more for the poor than the federal government.
nervousari
5 oct 2020
DID YOU KNOW? Al Capone started one of America's first soup kitchens during the Great Depression. By 1931, The Chicago Tribune reported that the Capone Free Soup Kitchen served over 120,000 meals every single day. Many Chicagoans credit Capone with doing more for the poor than the federal government.
New York Post 17 hrs
ARIZONA
Atta boy! Arizona police dog sniffs out stash of meth in car
shares
queenfox18 queenfox18
23 sep 2020
New York Post 17 hrs ARIZONA Atta boy! Arizona police dog sniffs out stash of meth in car shares
girl: I have nipple rings guy: I don't believe you girl: *proves it*
guy:
You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders!
girl: I have nipple rings guy: I don't believe you girl: *proves it* guy: You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders!
They say the average IT technician cocoons for 6months.
He then emerges with a fully formed shirt and pair of glasses.
Nature is just beautiful, isn't it?
AFloridian AFloridian
22 apr
They say the average IT technician cocoons for 6months. He then emerges with a fully formed shirt and pair of glasses. Nature is just beautiful, isn't it?
If you're ever having a bad day just remember this guy found out he was dead and was still going to work.
ChrisX99 ChrisX99
18 dec 2020
If you're ever having a bad day just remember this guy found out he was dead and was still going to work.
I could be happy AF and my face will
Still look like this
satansmuze satansmuze
30 sep 2020
I could be happy AF and my face will Still look like this
Brett Barlow Brett Barlow
When you're in the elevator and press the close button as people are approaching
elwaydante
10 oct 2020
Brett Barlow Brett Barlow When you're in the elevator and press the close button as people are approaching
munchkinbear munchkinbear
24 sep 2020
TikTok Why is Dwayne Johnson called the Rock ?
When you are about to go out with the boys so your girl beats ya off to make sure you have no energy to chase hoes
When you are about to go out with the boys so your girl beats ya off to make sure you have no energy to chase hoes
Every Canadian mom's favourite singer, Michael Buble, was recently spotted at Disneyland having absolutely zero clue what to do with corn on the cob.
burzteed
Ho looks so lost, someone help him
It's tke... He Anows, on some tovel, that this isn't the way it's done.
LiegeAnon LiegeAnon
24 sep 2020
Every Canadian mom's favourite singer, Michael Buble, was recently spotted at Disneyland having absolutely zero clue what to do with corn on the cob. burzteed Ho looks so lost, someone help him It's tke... He Anows, on some tovel, that this isn't the way it's done.