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    • DM, finally tired of the bard's shit:
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    • Dragon bouta booty rape that bard, no lube means extra damage
      jrc134 16 apr
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    • ...outside of it's sheer size, it's c@ck would be wear you like a Humanskin Condom and no amount of duct tape or Necromancer is gonna fix that...
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    • AxePuanch 16 apr
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    • In my campaigns, the vaginas of female dragons are covered in small teeth-like protrusions, similar to shark skin for gripping onto the male's dicks. In the recorded history of the world my campaigns take place, there's only 1 nondragon to have mated with a dragon. An elf named Rod the Dragonfucker.
      KorGarott 17 apr
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    • The dragon
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    • How to outright tell a player to fuck off
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    • My friend who wasn't a bard went to kill a goblin he tripped on his staff and the goblin nutted in his eye. I have no idea why but that was the only story he shared with me
      kguy43222 19 apr
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    • No joke, this happens in a podcast called Drunks and Dragons. A bard/healer chaotic neutral 4th wall breaking Dragonborn named Thom seduces Rakks and says “fly into the sunset and await for me my dear in the morning” to avoid huge combat. It worked. Drunk friends playing D&D since 2014
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    • This exact scenario happened to me. Except I needed to roll 5 con saves. Got back to the boat that the dragon took me from with 1hp and no spell slots. Two sessions later ended up with dragon triplets.
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    • Itsabait 16 apr
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    • When the DM tells you to roll a constitution save you know your dumb ass about to die
      WrongTime 16 apr
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    • How to make a bard reconsider seductions rolls
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    • I bet Donkey can seduce it
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    • Sponathan 17 apr
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    • Karsten02 20 apr
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    • rightbot 19 apr
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    • Yeah, just because you seduce something doesn't mean it'll do everything you say. You might just wnd up becoming a sex slave to an evil villain
      DrReid 16 apr
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    • How many people play dungeons and dragons? Must be quite a few with how often this shit is featured
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    • My friend Macy did this to the halfling rogue who kept rolling to seduce because she was sick of his shit. Ended up killing the halfling bc massive dragon schlong and he had to roll a new character. Apparently he never rolled to seduce again
      EriArts 16 apr
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    • I get it. DnD experiences can vary alot based on what the DM allows. But the ability to seduce everything is stupid. Same with the flying just by waving your arms if you roll nat 20.
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    • Dude in our party died being butt today by a minotaur.
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    • content not available more
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    • My buddy had a monk that was busted as shit, anyway his character seduced a ancient blue dragon. And we had to decommission Clark because the dragon was taking him to pound town for 10 sessions. She also enslaved a drow druid that was with us too. But not my dude. He got out Scott free.
      chilldout 17 apr
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    • In my campaign, the fighter of the group successfully seduced a female dragon and nearly drowned in her
      ETA215 17 apr
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    • Coming from a bard who did this shit to goblins I’m glad my character never got this far
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    • Roll for anal circumference
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    • See in my campaign I was lucky enough that the dragon was female... however by numerous strokes of luck, i guess, with my dice, I know have a fleet of half human/dragon monsters.
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    • Shit like this is why I'm glad my bard is too stupid to seduce anyone on purpose
      Raya0 18 apr
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    • Lmao, you are grappled and restrained. Roll for “please, no!”
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    • Actually had that scenario happen, but with a big ass statue. That poor half elf... The dick grew 3 inches every turn in his ass as we tried to fight the statue with our friend waving around on his dick like a flag on a flagpole
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    • A nat 20 is not always a good thing
      Jshortz 17 apr
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    • Death by snu snu
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    • Played my first game of DnD on Sunday. Now everyday I dont play it just seems boring
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    • Akumetsu 16 apr
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    • Roll for length, then for gerth
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    • I said SLAY the dragon. Not LAY the dragon.
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    • The dragons dik counts as a medium sized creature
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    • Deodubs 17 apr
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    • he was hoping it was gonna be like shrek and he was gonna get that mad dragon pussy, but nah
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    • Maybe the dragon is a bottom
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    • I remember one of my campaigners rolled to seduce a God, rolled a nat 20, and then was made God of Strength
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    • That's the kind of lewd dragon involvement that I look for
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    • Was playing D&D in a table top club a few years back and overheard a character death at another nearby table. Evidently their bard was about to "get busy" with some terrible creature and attempted to use a potion of fire breathing as lube...
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    • I lucked out when I accidentally seduced a female Silver Dragon that our bard had already failed to seduce just moments before.
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    • Smaug will desolate you
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    • i once had a player who was a bard and he got fucked by an elephant, nearly dying in the process
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    • Who assumed I’d bottom to a dragon? I BOTTOM FOR NO ONE I’M GOING TO MAKE EVEN SMAUG MY FUCKING BITCH AND RAM HIS HIGE DRAGON ASSHOLE
      JDBest45 19 apr
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    • Is the dm just another friend that his job is to fuck with you?
      SHOCK3Dx 18 apr
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    • Our Rogue tried to roll to seduce someone and our DM just let him. It worked and it really pissed our Bard off because both times he tried it he really fucked up
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    • Roll 1 for inches, roll 2 for days you can't walk
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    • Shoulda rolled Preception for Gender first lol
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    • Bad Dragon was never fetish toys, it was training toys
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    • He fucked his way in, he'll fuck himself out.
      Ryuuken 16 apr
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    • Same happened to our bard. They seduced a ghoul in a cave and rolled so good that the ghoul thought our bard looked “tasty” so we learned that ghouls have a vore fetish
      b656g 16 apr
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    • That's how you deal with a horny bard who fucks monsters
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    • Teach those Bards a lesson, DM
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    • So yes... Damage. Lots of it. You better hope your fast
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    • Donkey wants to know your location
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    • Bard will still be like
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    • Gets fucked to death by adult male dragon
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    • soo is the adult dragon gonna nail the bard or wat?
      nico_js 17 apr
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    • Homie about to get his guts rearranged, maybe next time he’ll think twice... or won’t, who knows
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    • She’s a bad dragon.
      Kurizo455 16 apr
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    • *The Lion Sleeps Tonight starts to play
      Gruukey 16 apr
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    • *JK Rowling chanting* in the ass. In the ass. In the ass. In the ass!
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    • Play stupid games, win stupid prizes
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    • Most adult dragons can shapeshift. Roll a check for trying to convince him to do that first.
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    • Bite down on the pillow babe.. I'M GOING IN DRY!!!
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    • Basically meaning roll higher than DM or suffer damage from taking it up the ass by a dragon
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    • The Bard asked for it really
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    • I've watched enough hentai to know where this is going...
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    • Fuck im hype about to dm my first game
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    • Am I the only one who has no clue wtf is happening.
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