A relationship should be she pays the rent and I live there
@Hoodville
chilla_chillout chilla_chillout
5 nov 2020
A relationship should be she pays the rent and I live there @Hoodville
Me: "hello sir, 'm your nurse"
My dementia patient:
is
@codebluememes
Yo
FUCKING WANT ONE?
IWannaKanoonMyselfB IWannaKanoonMyselfB
16 sep 2020
Me: "hello sir, 'm your nurse" My dementia patient: is @codebluememes Yo FUCKING WANT ONE?
Verizon LTE PM @ 100%
<o w
Amy J
Hey sweetie it's Amy! Randy was out mowing when he said he noticed you drive past smoking a cigar of some sort. A lot of children live on the street so I will speak on their behalf and request you keep your habits private from the kids!
hey! was just laquite!' bad
here
Moneyluv Moneyluv
18 feb
Verizon LTE PM @ 100% <o w Amy J Hey sweetie it's Amy! Randy was out mowing when he said he noticed you drive past smoking a cigar of some sort. A lot of children live on the street so I will speak on their behalf and request you keep your habits private from the kids! hey! was just laquite!' bad here
This fool said my eyebrows look like some stripper doing a split in some hooker boots and now I can't unsee it.
This fool said my eyebrows look like some stripper doing a split in some hooker boots and now I can't unsee it.
If anyone sees me at the beach this summer, mind your own business. I ate a lot of bread over the past 12 months.
1blondie 1blondie
14 apr
If anyone sees me at the beach this summer, mind your own business. I ate a lot of bread over the past 12 months.
When you're out for your birthday meal and you suddenly spot a cake coming round the corner and everyone starts singing
Please don't do this
cheryDragon cheryDragon
24 oct 2020
When you're out for your birthday meal and you suddenly spot a cake coming round the corner and everyone starts singing Please don't do this
POV you fell asleep at your post:
@broken_and_unread
Shorts_Papa Shorts_Papa
10 mar
POV you fell asleep at your post: @broken_and_unread
[first day as a mugger] me: *points gun* gimme all your money guy: please, I have kids
me: nah i'd rather have the money
kennugly kennugly
19 jan 2021
[first day as a mugger] me: *points gun* gimme all your money guy: please, I have kids me: nah i'd rather have the money
"You're an American Harry!"
sooner84 sooner84
15 apr
"You're an American Harry!"
lavs days til iron man #1
@ironvell
thortony humor
90/ AND NOW THAT WE HAVE HAD OUR TIME FOR PERSONAL MATTERS
--IN WHICH /ROW MAN
DOTH SEEM TO HAVE
FORGED YETANOTHER FACE MASK--
YOU JUST WISH YOU COULD HIDE YOUR UGLY FACE'
JamesFreakingBarnes JamesFreakingBarnes
25 sep 2020
lavs days til iron man #1 @ironvell thortony humor 90/ AND NOW THAT WE HAVE HAD OUR TIME FOR PERSONAL MATTERS --IN WHICH /ROW MAN DOTH SEEM TO HAVE FORGED YETANOTHER FACE MASK-- YOU JUST WISH YOU COULD HIDE YOUR UGLY FACE'
10 minutes into Evanescence and chill, and the goth girl gives you this look
Voted Voted
27 oct 2020
10 minutes into Evanescence and chill, and the goth girl gives you this look
Yes pizza is good, but what's with all the stand mixers?
ignorantmemerinoto ignorantmemerinoto
14 apr
Yes pizza is good, but what's with all the stand mixers?
I just knew I was being watched during my morning walk...
hive_of_many hive_of_many
24 sep 2020
I just knew I was being watched during my morning walk...
So Bob,...Mind telling me where the dog treats went? - So Bob,...Mind telling me where the dog treats went?
Leaps Leaps
27 sep 2020
So Bob,...Mind telling me where the dog treats went? - So Bob,...Mind telling me where the dog treats went?
DANGER
THE DOG HAS A GUN AND REFUSES TO TAKE HIS MEDICATION
USTEN
IR
DONT NEED MY EDS NEED TARGETS
TweeterWillard TweeterWillard
24 sep 2020
DANGER THE DOG HAS A GUN AND REFUSES TO TAKE HIS MEDICATION USTEN IR DONT NEED MY EDS NEED TARGETS
Alright I'll bite. What do I do for a living
@Sp
@Sp y]
Work as a butler in a haunted mansion and put your little hand in the mashed potatoes
AFloridian AFloridian
22 jun
Alright I'll bite. What do I do for a living @Sp @Sp y] Work as a butler in a haunted mansion and put your little hand in the mashed potatoes
john
@sexhaver4200
just seen a sponge bob show on the tv. why the yellow man don't leave the octopus alone
confusing confusing
26 sep 2020
john @sexhaver4200 just seen a sponge bob show on the tv. why the yellow man don't leave the octopus alone
Ryan Whitney Says He Could Identify
Every Guy On His College Hockey
Team Just By Looking At Their Dick
PM - Buffer
51 1,475
Kuznetsov Kuznetsov
14d
Ryan Whitney Says He Could Identify Every Guy On His College Hockey Team Just By Looking At Their Dick PM - Buffer 51 1,475
Girls on a dolphin tour: oh my gosh look at them they're so cute let's take a picture
Me and the boys on the dolphin tour:
MemesDaily2020 MemesDaily2020
26 sep 2020
Girls on a dolphin tour: oh my gosh look at them they're so cute let's take a picture Me and the boys on the dolphin tour:
If a toy from Toy Story died, the kids wouldn't know, and the other toys would have to watch the kids play with their
corpses.
Nescisne Nescisne
6 jan 2021
If a toy from Toy Story died, the kids wouldn't know, and the other toys would have to watch the kids play with their corpses.