• (A gay couple has just met up in the restaurant and kissed each other upon arrival. Another
customer has seen this and is obviously angry.)
Angry Customer: "Damn f**s."
Angry Customer: "You heard me, you little s***. Let's not make this into some little pride
protest, okay? I have to accept that you're going to live your lifestyle, and you have to accept
that I've got freedom of speech."
Gay Man: *quietly* "Is it too much to ask for a little human decency?"
Angry Customer: "Human? Listen up, what you're doing is not human. I think I have the
right to determine what I think is human."
(The manager shows up. He's a quiet Italian man who I assume is conservative due to the
Christian imagery and portrait of Reagan he keeps around the restaurant.)
Angry Customer: *to the owner* "Hey, can you move either them or us to another table?"
(Instead of responding to the angry customer, the owner instead speaks to his wife.)
Owner: "I'm sorry ma'am, but we have a strict 'no pets' policy in my restaurant."
Owner: "Well, according to your talking monkey over here, I can determine who's a human
and who's not. You bring an animal into my restaurant; I gotta assume it's your pet."
(The angry customer storms out. When I left, the owner was giving his description, and
copies of security camera footage, to the biggest crowd of police I've seen. Apparently it's a
bad idea to not pay your bill at a restaurant that gives free coffee to cops.)
    • EmailPinterestRedditTumblr Report
    • Copy link
    • Pinterest
  • 3 comments

    • Well the wife coulda paid the bill
      Big_Hunt_2015 1 aug 2014
      Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
      Show
    • Fucking quiet Italian I call bull shit
      iamnotyograndpa 1 aug 2014
      5 Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
      Show
    • Slow clap for this man.
      xastradax_2017 1 aug 2014
      2 Copy FacebookPinterestTwitterEmail {{ shortRepliesCount }}
      Show

iFunny plug-in will teach your phone to smile

get on the iFunny app to roast them

All content related issues will be solved right here.
After all necessary information is provided, of course:

Complete the form below to notify iFunny of a claim relating to your intellectual property rights and content or some technical inconvenience with the service.
(Positive and productive feedback is appreciated as well).

Your details

Your relationships to the rights holder

Type of claim

Select
Copyright Trademark Nazi-related Offensive Technical difficulties Other
Describe the issue in detail. Please be specific.
Feeling poetic today? Feel free to provide more information
By clicking on "Submit" below, you are certifying the following statements:
  • I state that I have a good faith belief that use of the work(s) in the manner complained of is not authorized by the copyright owner, its agent, or the law.
  • I state that the information in this notification is accurate and, under penalty of perjury, that I am the owner of the exclusive right that is allegedly infringed, or an authorized agent for the owner.
  • I give my permission to pass my contact information to the alleged infringing party.