A Father-To-Be Died While
Building A Gender-Reveal
Device That Exploded
Tasneem Nashrulla
Mocita
24 feb
A Father-To-Be Died While Building A Gender-Reveal Device That Exploded Tasneem Nashrulla
lavs days til iron man #1
@ironvell
thortony humor
90/ AND NOW THAT WE HAVE HAD OUR TIME FOR PERSONAL MATTERS
--IN WHICH /ROW MAN
DOTH SEEM TO HAVE
FORGED YETANOTHER FACE MASK--
YOU JUST WISH YOU COULD HIDE YOUR UGLY FACE'
JamesFreakingBarnes JamesFreakingBarnes
25 sep 2020
lavs days til iron man #1 @ironvell thortony humor 90/ AND NOW THAT WE HAVE HAD OUR TIME FOR PERSONAL MATTERS --IN WHICH /ROW MAN DOTH SEEM TO HAVE FORGED YETANOTHER FACE MASK-- YOU JUST WISH YOU COULD HIDE YOUR UGLY FACE'
This fool said my eyebrows look like some stripper doing a split in some hooker boots and now I can't unsee it.
This fool said my eyebrows look like some stripper doing a split in some hooker boots and now I can't unsee it.
Me: "hello sir, 'm your nurse"
My dementia patient:
is
@codebluememes
Yo
FUCKING WANT ONE?
IWannaKanoonMyselfB IWannaKanoonMyselfB
16 sep 2020
Me: "hello sir, 'm your nurse" My dementia patient: is @codebluememes Yo FUCKING WANT ONE?
There never seems to be anything good on tv
Well, at least I got you pizza!
There never seems to be anything good on tv Well, at least I got you pizza!
Sarah
During teaching today I was petting my cat and my co-teacher announced it and asked to see the cat. Then no fewer than 60% of the students reached down and pulled
THEIR cats up into view of the cameras and suddenly my Zoom squares were all cats and everything was perfect.
yoden22 yoden22
24 sep 2020
Sarah During teaching today I was petting my cat and my co-teacher announced it and asked to see the cat. Then no fewer than 60% of the students reached down and pulled THEIR cats up into view of the cameras and suddenly my Zoom squares were all cats and everything was perfect.
Lactose intolerant people when they realise they live in the milky way
(SCREAMING)
StolenMemes69 StolenMemes69
1 dec 2020
Lactose intolerant people when they realise they live in the milky way (SCREAMING)
Ryan Whitney Says He Could Identify
Every Guy On His College Hockey
Team Just By Looking At Their Dick
PM - Buffer
51 1,475
Kuznetsov Kuznetsov
14d
Ryan Whitney Says He Could Identify Every Guy On His College Hockey Team Just By Looking At Their Dick PM - Buffer 51 1,475
How often do you blink?
Fairly often
Never 20%
*20%
\\Js
tares
erfucker
Meth Meth
2 mar
How often do you blink? Fairly often Never 20% *20% \\Js tares erfucker
[first day as a mugger] me: *points gun* gimme all your money guy: please, I have kids
me: nah i'd rather have the money
kennugly kennugly
19 jan 2021
[first day as a mugger] me: *points gun* gimme all your money guy: please, I have kids me: nah i'd rather have the money
POV: You ask Jesus for ice cream but he reminds
you of your sins
POV: You ask Jesus for ice cream but he reminds you of your sins
If a toy from Toy Story died, the kids wouldn't know, and the other toys would have to watch the kids play with their
corpses.
Nescisne Nescisne
6 jan 2021
If a toy from Toy Story died, the kids wouldn't know, and the other toys would have to watch the kids play with their corpses.
When I'm given verbal instructions
Can you tihe part ofthe stuff where you all about (hings?
kingofsamoa kingofsamoa
27 jan 2021
When I'm given verbal instructions Can you tihe part ofthe stuff where you all about (hings?
When you're out for your birthday meal and you suddenly spot a cake coming round the corner and everyone starts singing
Please don't do this
cheryDragon cheryDragon
24 oct 2020
When you're out for your birthday meal and you suddenly spot a cake coming round the corner and everyone starts singing Please don't do this
Girls on a dolphin tour: oh my gosh look at them they're so cute let's take a picture
Me and the boys on the dolphin tour:
MemesDaily2020 MemesDaily2020
26 sep 2020
Girls on a dolphin tour: oh my gosh look at them they're so cute let's take a picture Me and the boys on the dolphin tour:
Verizon LTE PM @ 100%
<o w
Amy J
Hey sweetie it's Amy! Randy was out mowing when he said he noticed you drive past smoking a cigar of some sort. A lot of children live on the street so I will speak on their behalf and request you keep your habits private from the kids!
hey! was just laquite!' bad
here
Moneyluv Moneyluv
18 feb
Verizon LTE PM @ 100% <o w Amy J Hey sweetie it's Amy! Randy was out mowing when he said he noticed you drive past smoking a cigar of some sort. A lot of children live on the street so I will speak on their behalf and request you keep your habits private from the kids! hey! was just laquite!' bad here
@PoisonPillar
Easy. That's fajita
Casey Dri @LeanandCuisine-
Ladies since y'all are so smart, who is this guy?
Show this thread
Death_Row Death_Row
25 sep 2020
@PoisonPillar Easy. That's fajita Casey Dri @LeanandCuisine- Ladies since y'all are so smart, who is this guy? Show this thread
Alright I'll bite. What do I do for a living
@Sp
@Sp y]
Work as a butler in a haunted mansion and put your little hand in the mashed potatoes
AFloridian AFloridian
22 jun
Alright I'll bite. What do I do for a living @Sp @Sp y] Work as a butler in a haunted mansion and put your little hand in the mashed potatoes
chyrsoprases
I hope you like host clubs, cat.
LIVIAy LIVIAy
21 sep 2020
chyrsoprases I hope you like host clubs, cat.