• Little secret about me: my answer to the
question "would you like a receipt" is
based on absolutely nothing and
changes all the time
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  • 887 comments

    • It’s literally whatever my mouth says, my brain isn’t the one giving the answer.
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    • i always get gas receipts and give them to my dad to write off as business expense for his work and thats it
      __Sean__ 23 jul
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    • Always get one. You never know if you’ll need an alibi for something
      semeMdaeD 23 jul
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    • Buying gas: always yes, in case the gas ruins my engine. Buying food: always yes, in case I need to return it. Buying other things: ?????maybe????
      LuaDaddy 23 jul
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    • Always get a receipt. I just had to return a safe which didn't lock when it was closed. Not something you want to be stuck with.
      Vulchrys 23 jul
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    • Only need one if A: it's a purchase of $50 or more, or B: it's one item and I don't need a bag, but I don't feel like getting stopped for theft
      Quaike 23 jul
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    • And that’s exactly why I just put the receipt in the bag and don’t ask
      cheeks1 23 jul
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    • I get receipts when the person asking looks sketchy now cuz a dude at a gas station double charged me once when I said no.
      mreusaf 24 jul
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    • “euhh maybe sure i guess”
      nitwitty 23 jul
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    • Mines always yes. I collect receipts. For no reason. Got a giant bag stuffed and packed with them.
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    • I get receipts when I'm horny
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    • I want to fucking k1ll myself. But I can't do that to my family after seeing my dad k1ll himself. Can I get an F or some toxic shit ass hate comments I don't really give a fuck.
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    • I bought a donut and they gave me a receipt for the donut. I don’t need a receipt for a donut. I’ll just give you the money, you give me the donut. End of transaction. We don’t need to bring ink and paper into this. I can’t imagine a scenario where i would have to prove I bought a donut.
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    • i really only get a receipt if its something expensive and breakable like an electronic or something, or if its clothes/shoes that i couldnt try on in the store just in case it doesn't fit. food? don't really care
      vibrate 23 jul
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    • Bought gas for 25 dollars, used my card, didn't have cash on me. Came home took a closer look at my receipt and it says I spent 52 dollars. Says I also bought Sigarettes, beer, Pepsi. I'm like WTF. Went back, they apologized and gave me my $ back. That's why you need to save receipts. Also for IRS
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    • I always say yes just to stay safe, never know when you'll need an alibi.
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    • Taxes! Taxes! Always keep your receipts!
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    • I only get mine at like large (non grocery) stores because sometimes they ask to see your receipt and check your shit. I toss it out after that
      Grada 23 jul
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    • Depends on how expensive it is and how likely I am to return it for the most part.
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    • No if it’s not printed, no if it’s printed, and yes if I want a bitch to pay for what they asked me to get
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    • The only time I really get a receipt is the post office when I sell something and send it to the person
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    • My parents always say no
      Taelor 24 jul
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    • I always get receipts because at fast food retards mess up. My grandma once had to pay double at a gas station because they thought she didnt pay and more. No reason to not get one
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    • I just say sure
      chopstew 24 jul
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    • I always take it because I pretty much always use my debit card
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    • I always say no unless I don’t trust the mfs
      k_ramz 24 jul
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    • Based?
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    • I feel like mine changes with how the question is asked if they are rude I say no if they are nice and hand it out I’ll take it
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    • SCP-4559
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    • Always get em for taxes or some shit
      YourGuyCy 23 jul
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    • I get one when I use my credit card so I can mark it down in my checkbook. I don’t get one when I use cash.
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    • Sometimes i joke with other people about doing fucked up shit. Like pretending to swerving into stuff on the road
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    • Not sure if that’s actually Ninja Brian...
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    • For me it's dependent on if i bought something returnable that may stop working
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    • For the last few years I get a receipt for everything and just throw it in a garbage can in my closet, I have like 2 garbage bags of receipts just Incase I need something for tax write offs or if I return something. It doesn’t hurt anything I guess.
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    • I usually ask for the receipt on food orders because typically I dont like one thing on the item for burgers its pickles, tacos tomatoes, chicken sandwiches also pickles, ect. And its because one time I ordered it no pickle didnt get the receipt and when I asked them to fix it because no receipt
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    • merde 24 jul
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    • I only take a receipt if it's automatically given to me or if the cashier is already holding it. it was a lot more work for me when I was a cashier because I didn't have a trashcan and so would have a pile of trash receipts to keep separate from the ones I needed to keep
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    • Do I spy an ifunny watermark
      bequiet 23 jul
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    • Mine is based whether or not I can get reimbursed.
      DumbPunk 23 jul
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    • My dad was always afraid of getting audited, so he kept every receipt for every transaction within 5 years. Every. Receipt. Had a whole fucking cabinet dedicated to storage for them.
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    • Never in my life have I attempted to 'return' a product. It's my dumbass fault for buying it. Receipts for anything business related though
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    • I don’t get it
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    • You ain't special
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    • It's no secret anymore
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    • Same
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    • Item? Yes. Take-out/drive through or any food/drink worth less than $5? Nah.
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    • I always go ummmmm no thanks as if i need to think about whether im going to use it
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    • You ain’t accusing me of stealing
      AspyreN7 26 jul
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    • I always say no bc if you charge my card anything other than what we agreed upon the bank will take care of me and I will summon Satan to you and your family
      gay_dood 26 jul
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    • Asking if the customer wants a receipt is an automatic question and if you don't answer no my brain stops.
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    • If its over 100 and its something electronic yes
      run_this 26 jul
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    • Sometimes I sign both and give them both and leave before they tell me I need to keep one.
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    • I get one for bigger purchases but when I get a bag of chips and soda I’m not worried
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    • I always get a receipt if it is non-consumable, gas, or over 40 dollars.
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    • Same dude. Its all about what im feelin
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    • So that’s a no you don’t need it
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    • I get a receipt for large purchases
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    • Same lol
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    • I travel a lot for work and need them for expense reports
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    • I like to say yes then walk off
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    • Bought fish but tripped in the parking lot just to run back in to save them n get another bag
      iQFacts 26 jul
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    • Always no
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    • Tbh as a person of color, sometimes I have to ask 😒.
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    • I just start walking away before it prints. Usually they understand you don’t want one. Only old mf’s who work entry levels jobs yell at me “DO YOU WANT YOUR RECEIPT” and sometimes I don’t even say anything I just keep walking
      TurboTime 26 jul
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    • Pfp looks like he’s on the cover of an old drake album
      Cannaboy 26 jul
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    • Do you ever just feel empty inside.
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    • I usually say yes... but I really don’t know why....
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    • Its a coin flip between nah I'm good, and yeah sure
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    • This is the new doof meme
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    • Yes, niggas be stealing
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    • Depends on if it's already in the person's hand, I'll say sure just to take it
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    • Holy fuck I’m glad I’m not the only dumbass that does this. I always try and pay with Apple Pay though the receipts are instant and the transactions are saved
      AspergerS 26 jul
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    • Depends if the cashier is black
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    • Yup
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    • If it’s food or drink no unless it’s fast food Incase they get my order wrong everything else yes
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    • I panic a little bit and just say the first answer that comes to mind
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    • Only when you know the fast food place is known for fucking orders up
      CommonMan 25 jul
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    • It depends on how expensive the item purchased is, wether or not you plan on returning it or not
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    • People be annoying about receipts especially niggas be like it’s due to work. Like nigga are you that broke you couldn’t afford your own meal and need to keep track of every spending?
      skitts_cx 25 jul
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    • Good to know I’m not the only one
      wzaunby 25 jul
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    • If I’m buying for someone else I always get a receipt
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    • I thought this was Drake but then I looked closer
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    • Buying food - I only buy what I know I will eat and in portions I know I can eat them in so I don’t need a receipt | Buying gas - No because what are they gonna do take the gas back out of my car
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    • Always yes
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    • If it’s food or coffee, no. Clothes and shoes yes
      mahboolah 25 jul
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    • Same as my haircuts
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    • Yes
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    • I always say yes in case my card gets overcharged or some shit so i have proof
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    • my dad always says “nah im not bringing it back”
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    • I just can’t imagine a scenario where I would have to prove that I bought a donut (Mitch Hedburg).
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    • I always say yes always paranoid I'm gonna need an alibi if some unexpected murder comes up
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    • I always get a receipt for electic things, expensive/easily breakable things, food in case I find something gross, like mold, hair, etc, clothes. Then ill randomly think, this $1 lighter might stop working in a week and ill need to replace it so i need this receipt, then it lasts for like two months
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    • I always get it, just in case
      OHMBRA 25 jul
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    • Only time I ever save them is while traveling, for reimbursement, or at target bc of their app. Everything else doesn’t matter, and if I ever need an alibi (unlikely) the transaction will still be recorded on my account / on their card machine
      Proc 25 jul
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    • Same
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    • Haha until you get audited.
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    • At a retail store, its yes cause that prints automatically anyways, but anywhere else its no
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    • I get receipts for everything and then once a week make sure my checkbook balances out with the banking app and figure out any outliers. I live in a sketchy area and I've caught 2 attempts at fraud within a day of them happening by doing this
      Gardeeboo 25 jul
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