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peter parker in the 2002 movie is
fuckin.... incredible. he gets bitten by a
fuckin jacked red blue spider and he
doesnt say ”hey someone should take
me to the hospital mayhaps?" he just
goes home. then the bite swells to the
size of a fuckin jawbreaker but he’s like
”nah ijust need a nap." then he wakes
up the next day and discovers that he
DOESN’T NEED HIS GLASSES
ANYMORE and he has a fuckin six pack.
does he flip his entire Fuck? no. he
says, ”cool.” iconic.
& laughingfish
2002 peter parker had no health
insurance
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    • who's gonna complain about waking up with a six pack
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    • Peter Parker gets Cancer from a radioactive spider but gets next day treatment
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    • Thank God Obamacare wasnt invented yet
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    • If I woke up with the ability to see clearly without two pieces of glass in front of my eyes I’d be happy too lmfao
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    • Nah he was foreshadowing Obama care
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    • But lets talk about when he killed mj by giving her cancer with his radioactive semen.
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    • dont let that distract you from spiderman killing mj due to his radioactive man juice and breaking gwen stacys spine trying to save her
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    • Meanwhile current Spider-Man be like, “Mr Stark my peepee stands in the morning”
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    • They didn’t wanna waste a movie for Tom Holland’s Spider-Man origin because everyone already knows the story
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    • That's actually very realistic then considering it is also realistic that he didn't have health insurance
      ProPain 28 may
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    • With a rich ass best friend
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    • That’s what made him the best Spider-Man. He actually had stuff to worry about. Unlike the new peter who has to worry about impressing his imaginary girlfriend who’s dad he catches hands with on the regular...
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    • Peter Parker was a genius college student who couldn’t afford health insurance. America
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    • Tobey Maguire was the best Spider-man; Tom Holland is only a very close second. Change my mind
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    • Considering health care was cheaper back then because they didn’t force insurance companies to give us affordable health care that’s actually more expensive the average ass person won’t be able to afford health insurance at all
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    • Why specifically the 2002 movie? That's how it always happened. That's the only way that it happens. Are you only pointing to the fact that he takes off his glasses and says "cool?" Fuck you tumblr.
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    • Toby > Tom
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    • I dont think any peter parker has health insurance
      _Raccoonz 28 may
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    • “Are you feeling any change?” “Change?” *looks down* “YEP! Big change!”
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    • No Peter Parker has health insurance
      Madawm 28 may
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    • That’s “the hospitals have a hitman at the door for you” level avoidance
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    • Till this day I still wonder if they ever fixed the damn door
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    • 2002 peter parker didn't use web shooters it came out of his wrist now that's better and storyline was better in my opinion
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    • No version of Peter Parker has health insurance
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    • 2002 was actually accurate to the older Peter portrayed in comics. I like to think of Holland as Ultimate Spider-Man and Tobey as The Amazing Spider-man
      _Maxie_ 28 may
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    • I swear people make up shit like “mayhaps” just so people see it in a meme and flip out over it
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    • Toby Maguire is the real spiderman
      MegaSheen 28 may
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    • If I'm not mistaken, Peter Parker was a freelance photographer. Meaning, since he was his own boss, he didn't have access to company insurance
      chvh806 28 may
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    • My dad went home often getting shot in the head. College student with two kids, one on the way, no insurance, and 2 shit jobs. You walk that shit off.
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    • Then he beats the fuck out of flash unlike the new pussy bitch spiderman
      soylent 1 jun
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    • Someone watches cinema sins
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    • He died and woke up in heaven with the perfect body
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    • May fucking haps!??
      JoshuaKay 30 may
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    • Bet he wished he went to a doctor when he killed Mary Jane with radioactive load after radioactive load
      Solo1031 30 may
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    • Very few Peter Parkers have health insurance
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    • The Sam Raimi spider man movies were the best except for the third one in my opinion
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    • The last time spiderman could actually do what a spider can.
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    • “does he flip his entire Fuck?” shut the fuck up
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    • Is it just me, or are half of these features the same ones that were featured last night??
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    • M A Y H A P S
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    • Tobey Maguire Spiderman is best spiderman
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    • He was under 18 and his guardians were poor, he had medicaid
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    • Oldie but goldie
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    • kanep0e 28 may
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    • Peter Parker has never had health insurance
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    • Meroune 28 may
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    • I liked the reason in TASM where Peter couldn’t go get help because then they would’ve known he trespassed into Oscorp.
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    • he didn’t really think I’ll take a nap he just passed out and couldn’t move
      Nowheire 28 may
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    • He was also a college student. At that point you’re hoping something will take you out so you don’t have to deal with crippling debt
      dufuq 28 may
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    • What if peter Parker is actually in a coma from the toxic spider bite and the whole MCU is just his dream?
      Geoffrels 28 may
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    • “Does he flip his entire fuck”
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    • Peter Parker impregnated Mary Jane with radioactive sperm and she died
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    • "does he flip his entire fuck?"
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    • God, I wish I was 2002 Peter Parker. Not so I can be Spider-Man, so I can lose my glasses and man tiddies.
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    • Mayhaps? Tf Is mayhaps
      trebre 28 may
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    • Mayhaps
      i_am_vide 28 may
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    • In 2002, a hospital visit without insurance cost between 100 and 300 a night. Compare that to today's 2500/HR in the ER... Thanks Obama.
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    • Say what you want about Toby McGuire, I feel each iteration captured a key component of spider man. McGuire had the nerdy poor/awkward peter Parker nailed. Andrew Garfield had the resourcefulness/quips and Tom Holland’s only downfall is his suits are too stark inspired (doesn’t ruin it, but still)
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    • 2002 Spider-Man for the win
      bobasuar 28 may
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    • That’s why I don’t like the direction of the new Spider-Man.... never needed iron cocks help In the comics lol
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    • As a canadian I often forget most people have to pay for health care
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    • Consent is sexy
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    • People who hate on the toby miguire spoderman are personally attacking everyone born from 96-2000 cuz we grew up on that shit
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    • Who the fuck says mayhaps
      _Biatch 28 may
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    • I grew up with those movies, Tobey is best Spidey
      Electrike 28 may
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    • Peter Parker didn’t cry over tony stark, he cried when all men cried. At uncle bens death. If that didn’t make you cry you’re a sociopath
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    • And when he checks his pubes he knows he will make Mary Jane AND Gwen happy.
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    • No peter parker has health insurance 😂
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    • bkmtex 28 may
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    • Those first three movies were the best
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    • neither do I. Can I be spiderman
      BLU3Boi 2 jun
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    • Here's my film theory: When Tony Stark first approached Peter in civil war it was right after the 2002 spider man movie
      yaboyyy 2 jun
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    • “Mayhaps”
      BPace12 2 jun
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    • He didnt go to the hospital cause he fell into a coma due to the spider bite. He woke up and fealt super energetic but had the pressure of school to occupy his mind so he couldn't dwell on it.
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    • He also gets a big dick, if you’ll recall. Oddly enough, that makes a little sense. Certain venoms can give you a priapism, a massive boner that doesn’t go away.
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    • Mayhaps
      TheOrly 1 jun
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    • Are you fucking with me? Miles Davis in spider-verse got bitten by a glowing spider the size of his and and just bitch slapped that itch!
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    • That seems like something I would do I get bit and infected by shit all the time but I don't like doctors or inconveniencing people once I got bit by something in the woods and my entire leg swelled and got numb and my reaction was survival of the fittest if I die I deserved it
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    • No Peter parker has health insurance, they're all broke😂
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    • Toby McGuire was the best Spider-Man
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    • Peter parker never has health insurance
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    • Miles Morales bite scene is even better.
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    • To be fair, I’m pretty sure no one of them have insurance
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    • My dad wakes up to a 6 pack every day. Just not the same kind
      Phartbox 28 may
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    • I like the new Spider-Man movies but the first 2 Toby ones were awesome!
      alexrbos 28 may
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    • It's sad when you've seen a meme so many times you don't even have to read the full thing anymore to know what is talking about
      kyle221b 28 may
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    • Fucking Obamacare ruining spiderman
      tygo2003 28 may
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    • He literally tried googling the shit
      gamer1042 28 may
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    • Peter Parker is fuckin poor, what’s he supposed to do
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    • Into the spiderverse 2 petition to bring back cartoon Toby Maguire Spider-Man
      pieguy1 28 may
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    • No Peter parker ever has had health insurance
      Panda1341 28 may
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    • Does any Peter Parker have health insurance? .... does anyone have the iron man "we have money" spiderman "oh thank god" picture?
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