• You got duty this morning
Yes you fucking do and it's roger or
yes Sergeant
If you don't show up at 0900 I'm
going to get the master key come
up to your room and drag you out of
bed dressed or not
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  • 1350 comments

    • SSG was ready to breach and clear his ass
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    • Hold your horses, Roger
      guap 30 jul
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    • Real plot twist: the key is to the guys home, the SSG shows up and instead of dragging his ass out of bed, becomes the big spoon to show dominance
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    • Damn what a weird change in the power dynamic
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    • Imagine if he responded with 'Ooh, you'll drag me out of bed in my pjs? Haha then what?'
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    • Should’ve said “come get me then” waited for the guy to realize his mistake
      MrGlass47 31 jul
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    • Fucking power move
      SCP_4999 31 jul
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    • How do you not know your soldier is out?
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    • Got 1 more month boys than that glorious DD214 WILL BE MINE!!!
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    • Come get me then step sergeant 😘😘
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    • Plot twist: the master key is to the house; the SSG shows up and drags him out of his home.
      erma4nerd 31 jul
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    • After 8 fucking years finally got my DD214 almost 5 years ago. Still doesn't seem real loll. During the summers when it's stupid hot in my house I wake up legitimately thinking I'm back in Iraq for a few seconds.
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    • Super Saiyan God
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    • Almost 3 years left till that DD214 baybee
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    • Fuckers got til 9 as and this is an issue? By 9 I can shit shower shave exercise jerk one out shower again and be ready
      Grimnlock 31 jul
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    • Well well well, how the turntables
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    • I get out of the army in under a month 😂 I spent 6 YEARS in the shit. I 'm glad I never got blown up and that I never had a dickhead NCO like that.
      drakeo7 31 jul
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    • August 29, 2020 I’m almost home free!!
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    • I love this-fake or not it’s fucking hilarious
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    • He obviously only did the 4 years, he's still not a true civilian until the remaing 4 inactive reserve years are done. It's a required minimum 8 years of service if one decides to join.
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    • Crazy this man is talking to a Super Saiyan God.
      SourDaddy 31 jul
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    • What’s a DD214
      atincan 31 jul
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    • Eventually, I shall receive that lovely DD214. Soon. Thank god
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    • I have a story similar to this, I am since separated from the navy. However while I was still active I took leave and my duty section called me asking why I wasn't at muster also asking me to stand the next watch. They called me at 7 am and woke me up, and not fully awake had explain I make watch.
      propane97 31 jul
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    • 4 more months!!!!! And I’m free
      iixxu 1 aug
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    • To everyone on these comments who have served... THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE! Greatly appreciated, much respect.
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    • What’s a DD214? I’m too civilian.
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    • I’m in the army, fun story this scenario happened, but the guy told some random barracks room number. What commenced after was an ass whooping by the SFC to the wrong private. The other guy had already left the barracks.
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    • My buddy got his 214 printed out on a blanket, because he said it was so comforting when he received it, he never wanted that to end.
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    • "do you remember? When I left service in September?"
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    • Wish I never joined. That shit fucked my life up once I was discharged. Couldn’t get a job, couldn’t get a loan, banned from places that I knew the owner. I got into college and got a degree luckily and now shits going back to normal.
      akeda 1 aug
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    • Got my DD214 in 2011 and it makes it easier for me to tell people to go fuck themselves.
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    • One thing that won't be missed about the army is the constant power tripping
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    • Everyone getting their DD214 an my dumbass signed a 6year contract
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    • I dont understand how the power roles switched as if SSG was above him when he served then when he got out it should be the same rank unless he power ranked it before discharge. So why would SSG need to call a now civilian Sir?
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    • I thought SSG was foe Super Saiyan God
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    • Got 5 more months Lord help me
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    • Man who's duty starts at 0900
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    • I would have said, "Do it bitch" and laugh to myself about the poor bastard that took my room after leaving the barracks
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    • I got 7 days boys I made it out!
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    • The abbreviation is weird for me, a SSGT is a staff sergeant. A SGT is a sergeant. So an SSG is a sergeant in this case? WHERES THE EXTRA S COMING FROM??
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    • imagine having to say yes sir over text
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    • Whoever made the duty roster is a retard.
      MrSwerve 1 aug
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    • Guys what’s a dd 214?
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    • k1nf 31 jul
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    • My dad was in the army and served in Iraq and had a recruiter call and message him asking if he’d ever think about joining the military. I forget what my dad said as a response but it was funny
      brizza 1 aug
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    • I kept getting added to new group chats after I got out, and I told them to stop adding me or I would spam them with furry porn. They disregarded my warning. I dont make empty threats
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    • I was navy and somewhere in my contract I got 20yrs inactive reserve, been out since 2001 n legally I'm not done til next year
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    • I thought ssg stood for sausage. I'm dumb lol
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    • I’m on duty right now 😕
      ItzNate 1 aug
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    • and people wonder why I never want to join the army
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    • To all military men and women, thank you for your service, whether it is past or present.
      MissEnvy 2 aug
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    • Dude I lat moved from the Marines to the Army and after 2 years in the Army I got orders to report for duty by the Marines... I was in Ft Bliss preparing to deploy.
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    • He’s out but still addresses him as SSG?
      jiujitz 31 jul
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    • It goes like this: man I can't wait to get my dd214 and get tf out! *A few months later* damn, i should've stayed in...
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    • What are you doing Step Sargent?
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    • I hate the army lmao
      TheGrey 31 jul
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    • Got out last friday... four long grueling years and I'm finally done. Time to finally be a human being again lol I'm fucking ecstatic bro.
      gigido 3 aug
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    • Is this some military joke I’m too civilian to understand?
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    • Roger Sargent? Bruh sargents are douches compared to petty officers
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    • When I saw the contact and the first "no" I clenched.
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    • There's no "sir" just cuz you're a fucking civilian. That's only out of social courtesy.
      FatTard 31 jul
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    • Not related but knowing what a dd214 was is how I found out my best friends ex husband was a dirty no good liar. He always told her that he served in the Air Force and got out due to medical discharge but had no idea what a dd214 was. If you’re gonna lie, at least learn something about it
      Redneck_7 31 jul
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    • Fake as hell
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    • The whole conversation makes me horny.
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    • “Oh shit my bad” bruh
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    • I hate these fake ass messages
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    • I hate these fake text memes
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    • Soon i will have my DD214...soon...
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    • Don't call me sir I work for a living "
      SayuriRin 31 jul
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    • Damn if hes a Staff sergeant he demoted him self
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    • I’m leaving for the Army Basic on the 18th going to Fort Jackson what’s DD214
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    • I got out April of ‘82. Most of you weren’t even sperm cells yet!
      MitchN60 1 aug
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    • Reminds me of when I got a new 📱 #. Some guy kept texting me asking me for 💊. Kept telling him it was the wrong number. Every month, same thing. Then one day i responded with "yes daddy. I have it for you. 😘"
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    • This must be an army thing. They are too retarded to remember ranks so they call everyone e-5 and up a sergeant.
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    • Wait, the military texts orders now? Oof.
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    • Can't wait for this. 5 more months
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    • Oh god this is so beautiful😂😂
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    • Got out on May 22 of this year. What a wild ride the last 8 years were
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    • Marine I bet lol
      Toxitman 1 aug
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    • I get out of the the Corps in less than a year and a half
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    • whats a dd214?
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    • I've got my DD214 or FIGMO!
      Imall469 31 jul
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    • Is this some kind of military joke I'm too civilian to understand?
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    • AirMann 31 jul
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    • More meat for the grinder!
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    • Most people put us on pedistools, but in reality we are still just Americans in a uniform and are still greedy self absorbed pieces of shit. We need to be better.
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    • Man I got 7 more months til I get mine, can’t fucking wait
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    • Man, seeing all of these comments about being over the military makes me think I should go national guard on second thought lol. Is active duty really that bad? I’m 18 and just graduated a few months ago and honestly don’t know if I should enlist or not.
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    • Everyone in here can’t wait to leave the army meanwhile kids in highschool see the army like: oooo 👁👄👁
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    • All these military terms
      bvdxibes 2 aug
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    • I got 4 more years
      CGISONIC 2 aug
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    • Should’ve told him fucking do it then little bitch and then text him back a day or two later and be like hey where were you at
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    • That's funny and shit but I really wanna see sarge beat the breaks off you now
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    • Props to both of them lol
      De_gato 1 aug
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    • I'm still in my old squads group chat, man I'm so glad I'm not a part of all that tomfoolery anymore. Waking up at 0300 for a ruck March at 0600?!?! No thanx
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    • He should’ve said “lmao do it” then SSG would’ve found out on his own that he was stupid
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    • The holy grail that is the the DD214. I have mine framed.
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    • The army is so gay. The only reason y’all have E-1 thru E-4 is so it looks like y’all are moving up but in reality you’re still given absolutely no responsibility and that’s why the Marines Corps will always be top dog cause our ranks actually mean something. Except Gunny. Gunnys don’t give a fuck.
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