VIOLETS ARE BLUE, YOUR
BLOOD IS RED
OPEN,I'M UNDER YOUR
BED. - ✌🏼
GageWalker1 GageWalker1
24 jun 2020
VIOLETS ARE BLUE, YOUR BLOOD IS RED OPEN,I'M UNDER YOUR BED. - ✌🏼
My resume pales in comparison.
ALAN MOORE
Writer / Wizard / Mall Santa / Rasputin Impersonator
News
marinara_pastasauce marinara_pastasauce
17 mar
My resume pales in comparison. ALAN MOORE Writer / Wizard / Mall Santa / Rasputin Impersonator News
@LilithLovett
"To get one's revenge is Based.
To pussy out at the last second during the third act is Cringe".
- Confucius
Bonti Bonti
24 feb
@LilithLovett "To get one's revenge is Based. To pussy out at the last second during the third act is Cringe". - Confucius
facebook informed me that 8 years ago today my mom made me take a photo with our waiter who I thought was hot at the cheesecake factory
ScrumDiggitty ScrumDiggitty
18 nov 2020
facebook informed me that 8 years ago today my mom made me take a photo with our waiter who I thought was hot at the cheesecake factory
Me: "We're leaving in 5 minutes, are you dressed?"
My toddler:
Phil_Latio Phil_Latio
20 jan 2021
Me: "We're leaving in 5 minutes, are you dressed?" My toddler:
Me trying to put my The next change and receipt person in line in my pock
fetusprime666 fetusprime666
3 nov 2020
Me trying to put my The next change and receipt person in line in my pock
TIL Costco's hot dog has remained $1.50 since it was first introduced in 1984. After the company president complained they were losing money on it, CEO Jim Sinegal
put his foot down. "If you raise [the price of] the effing hot dog, will kill you,"
Sinegal said.
TIL Costco's hot dog has remained $1.50 since it was first introduced in 1984. After the company president complained they were losing money on it, CEO Jim Sinegal put his foot down. "If you raise [the price of] the effing hot dog, will kill you," Sinegal said.
booksididnt
My resume pales in comparison.
ALAN MOORE
Writer / Wizard / Mall Santa / Rasputin Impersonator
News
booksididnt My resume pales in comparison. ALAN MOORE Writer / Wizard / Mall Santa / Rasputin Impersonator News
INS THE GARHER, ISN'THE?
No. What if were to say io you
"Meesa beena bad Girl'?
HunterForHire HunterForHire
27 sep 2020
INS THE GARHER, ISN'THE? No. What if were to say io you "Meesa beena bad Girl'?
Someone please feed the poor kid
okay_a_stolen_porch okay_a_stolen_porch
10 nov 2020
Someone please feed the poor kid
When you accidentally step on your dog's tail
Xanloveless Xanloveless
22 sep 2020
When you accidentally step on your dog's tail
/pcmasterrace
@1 Bi @3 @1
Posted by i.redd.it
My sister has been saving for a PC for over a year, but 2020 sucks. She had
to put her cat down, lost her job due to covid, had to burn though her PC savings in the last few months. Her birthday is next week, I decided to try and make this year a little better for her.
GIGABYTE
Share
on that
1200AM 1200AM
21 sep 2020
/pcmasterrace @1 Bi @3 @1 Posted by i.redd.it My sister has been saving for a PC for over a year, but 2020 sucks. She had to put her cat down, lost her job due to covid, had to burn though her PC savings in the last few months. Her birthday is next week, I decided to try and make this year a little better for her. GIGABYTE Share on that
When she likes watching you eat her
wifey87 wifey87
6 apr
When she likes watching you eat her
DIP MY PIZZA IN KETCHUR
staples1724 staples1724
28 jan
DIP MY PIZZA IN KETCHUR
A little boy asks his dad; "What's be mom's legs?"
tween mom's legs?"
The father answers," Paradise."
The kid asks again, "Whats between your legs?" The father replies, "The key to paradise."
Then, the son says, "Piece of advice dad, change the lock. The neighbor has a copy."
total_insertrave total_insertrave
17 jun
A little boy asks his dad; "What's be mom's legs?" tween mom's legs?" The father answers," Paradise." The kid asks again, "Whats between your legs?" The father replies, "The key to paradise." Then, the son says, "Piece of advice dad, change the lock. The neighbor has a copy."
I dated a guy with the same name as my brother and when we had sex I refused to moan his name so I moaned his gamertag
AM - Twitter Web Client
Meth Meth
18 nov 2020
I dated a guy with the same name as my brother and when we had sex I refused to moan his name so I moaned his gamertag AM - Twitter Web Client
When she ask you what
your finger game is like.
SirLongflop SirLongflop
17 jul 2020
When she ask you what your finger game is like.
Stay Back to the Futmse mashups by Thinty
UrkelBot UrkelBot
1 may
Stay Back to the Futmse mashups by Thinty
Me: *accidentally makes eye contact with the crackhead outside of 7-11*
The crackhead:
of
YOur soul is mine.
ASS
BarrettFan101 BarrettFan101
15 dec 2020
Me: *accidentally makes eye contact with the crackhead outside of 7-11* The crackhead: of YOur soul is mine. ASS
Why is everyone staring at my food?
delightedGaming delightedGaming
6 jan 2021
Why is everyone staring at my food?